As a best friend, you’ve been there for it all. The happy times and the bad have passed you by and now it’s time to be the shoulder to cry on in their time of grief. Sometimes with hundreds of miles between you being away at college, it can be hard to be there for them, but It’s important to be the best listener possible over the phone or in person. Here are five tips to helping your BFF through a rough breakup.
1. Make sure you show that you are listening and that you care.
The most important thing for the person in grief is to know that you’re listening to their feelings and that you genuinely care about them. Make sure to maintain eye contact with them, don’t interrupt, and give cues that you’re listening. Avoid looking at your phone and make them feel like their feelings are valid.
2. Understand that they need time.
No matter how long the relationship, a breakup will take a toll on anyone. You can’t expect them to shed a few tears and be over it. These things take time. Don’t try to rush the grieving process. Sometimes all you need is a week in bed with your best friend, a carton of ice cream, and rewatching “Dirty Dancing” over and over to heal you up.
3. Don’t relate your previous break up with their present.
The last thing they want to hear during this time is about your last breakup. This is their time, not yours. They were there for you when you were sad, you have to be there for them!
4. Don’t sit around sh*t talking the ex.
The two may get back together, so it’s never a good idea to sit around talking bad about the ex. Just nod your head and agree with them but as hard as it might be, try not to engage in the trash talk. You will just be the bad guy in the end.
5. Do something nice for them:
It’s always nice to have something to distract them from the breakup. Music is one of the best medicines. Pick happy songs with a few sad ones thrown in there. Any light reading material like some magazines is good to get their mind off anything. And food food food! This is the perfect time for them to cheat on their diet!
All in all, just make sure that you’re always there for them and you will get the same in return.