1. When Dwight introduced us to a new way of thinking:
“Whenever I’m about to do something, I think, ‘Would an idiot do that?’ and if they would, I do not do that thing.”
2. When he describes what really matters in life:
“All you need is love. False. The four basic human necessities are air, water, food, and shelter.”
3. When he showed us a good way to respond to a compliment:
“I don’t believe you, continue.”
4. When he explains how to determine suspicion:
“It’s never the person who you most suspect. It’s also never the person you least suspect since anyone with half a brain would suspect them the most. Therefore, I know the killer to be Phyllis… The person who I most medium suspect.”
5. When he confirmed our every thought while in a crowded place:
“Why are all these people here? There are too many people on this earth. We need a new plague.”
6. When he reminded us to always be on the edge of our seat:
“I saw Wedding Crashers accidentally. I bought a ticket for “Grizzly Man” and went into the wrong theater. After an hour, I figured I was in the wrong theater, but I kept waiting. Cuz that’s the thing about bear attacks… they come when you least expect it.”
7. When he lets us know what we should look out for:
“There are 3 things you never turn your back on: bears, men you have wronged, and a dominant male turkey during mating season.”
8. When he makes sure we know to always learn our rules:
“Learn your rules. You better learn your rules. If you don’t, you’ll be eaten in your sleep. *crunch*”
9. When he gave us his best insight on avoiding illness:
“The principle is sound. To avoid illness, expose yourself to germs, enabling your immune system to develop antibodies. I don’t know why everyone doesn’t do this… Maybe they have something against living forever.”
10. When he confirmed every human’s weakness:
“Nostalgia is truly one of the great human weaknesses. Second only to the neck.”