How to Win: You vs. Yourself

Photo by Philipe Cavalcante on Unsplash


In the midst of social situations, it’s completely normal to feel awkward or insecure. When these feelings consume your thoughts, however, they begin to slowly tilt your crown- don’t let them! Here are three key thoughts to always keep locked in the back of your mind for the sole purpose of not letting your own self critic get the best of you:

Everyone is worried about themselves:

It can be so tough to walk into a room full of people you either don’t know or aren’t close to- but a situation like this is one that your inner critic feasts upon. Everyone has feelings of inferiority or uneasiness, however the trick is to understand that everyone is concerned with themselves and aren’t paying that much attention to you. In almost all situations, we are the first to judge ourselves and are the only thing standing in the way from accessing the fortitude we have deep down. If you can remember that people are selfish, mainly thinking about how they themselves are acting rather than judging you on how you’re acting, you can conquer this tricky brain game.

Be you:

Be yourself- haven’t heard that one before, have you? This cheesy pair of words that made an appearance in a lot of our instagram bios in 2012 has most likely been ingrained in your head, and probably seems a bit “been there done that” for advice on this particular topic. But take the time to dive deeper into the meaning of it, and take it literally. Be yourself- laugh and do what you want to, but don’t feel obligated to laugh at something that really doesn’t amuse you; access your inner crazy, and let it consume you. This overused, over-said, and completely ESSENTIAL phrase is the key to living this 24/7 party we call life.

Become comfortable in being uncomfortable:

We all have an emotional comfort zone, one that differs from the “comfort” we have in our room or in our immediate friend group. Our emotional comfort zone lies deep down, containing the boundaries we all have in which we either feel a little uncomfortable, a little awkward, and maybe a little out of place. These boundaries are the absolute threshold to the unknown, and while it may seem scary, understand that the unknown should be exciting, not restricting. Feeling nervous or anxious often results in those insecure, uncomfortable feelings- sometimes these feelings are accompanied by those “butterflies” we all know and love. If you learn to find a sense of excitement and adventure amidst the uneasiness, your comfort zone will slowly but surely grow.