The Corniest Christmas Traditions That’ll Make You Miss Being a Kid

The Christmas season is such a magical time of year, with deadly stampedes at Walmart on Black Friday, emptying your bank account and working extra hours to get your loved ones that one special gift, and crying about being single on Christmas, for the 5th year in a row. As we get older, the magic- and reality, of Christmas seems to die out. Let’s take a walk down memory lane and look at all the enchanting traditions we used to participate in in the early 2000’s.

1. Leaving Cookies out for Santa

As kids, we wouldn’t dare go to bed on December 24th without a plate of cookies and a glass of milk out for Santa to snatch up. Waking up to a half-drank glass and cookies with little nibbles out of them was cold hard evidence that Santa was DEFINITELY in your house. Meanwhile, someone in your house had coincidentally had cookies and milk on their breath that same morning.

2. Reading the Night Before Christmas on Christmas Eve

This one may only apply to a niche audience, but reading “The Night Before Christmas” on the actual night before Christmas was probably the corniest tradition we could possibly participate in. The book simply added the extra sprinkle of motivation we all needed to get to sleep that night, or else Santa wouldn’t bring us our presents. Nowadays some of us legitimately help our parents carry our presents down the stairs and under the tree on Christmas Eve. Don’t get me wrong, however, having a family to spend Christmas with, never mind receive presents from, is a blessing in itself.

3. Making Reindeer Food

How else were we going to ensure that Santa didn’t miss our house on his one-night global excursion? There was nothing quite as pleasurable than making food for the reindeer that would be stopping at your house that night. Funny enough, those massive flying animal’s meal of choice is oats garnished with glitter. We never judged, though.

4. Taking Corny Christmas Photos

If you celebrate Christmas, and have never sat with your fussy family on a staircase somewhere, wearing all-white outfits frolicking on the beach, or posed in any other cringey manner with your monstrosity of a family, have you even lived? Unfortunately, this one doesn’t stay in the past, we’ll most likely be taking these photos for decades. They do make for great memories, though, so maybe they’re not all that bad.

5. Tracking Santa on Christmas Eve

Ah, yes. Tracking Santa on Christmas Eve was quite possibly my favorite thing to do as a kid. Us millennials had the benefit of technology to let us know exactly where Santa was in the world. And when he started to near our region of the country, we knew we had to say goodnight and run off to bed. Those were the days, man.

6. Having a Family Member Dress Up as Santa

Still, to this day, I cannot understand why every year my Uncle Anthony is in the bathroom the entire time Santa visits our house on Christmas! Without fail, my uncle will go to the bathroom, and doesn’t come out until Santa has said his goodbyes and moved on to the next kids house. Such a coincidence, really.