When the butterflies stop fluttering in your tummy and the cute jokes turn into arguments about playing too much, what happens to the relationship? Well, you either sink or you swim and that’s up to both parties involved.
Relationships seem really complicated but honestly it’s not the relationship, it’s us. We as people, girls and guys alike, make being in a relationship way harder than it has to be. We get so caught up in the beginning and once the honeymoon stage is over and things become routine we often let the excitement and passion of being in love die.
This is the start of Her Campus ODU’s relationship building series. In part one, we’ll teach you how to begin a relationship and create a strong foundation to hopefully avoid filling another ‘blank space’ on your list of ex-lovers as T-Swift would say.
Source: Giphy
The key to keeping a relationship is having strong and genuine communication from the very beginning. It’s important for you and your potential partner to make your intentions and expectations clear, don’t be afraid to talk about what you want! This will eliminate any doubt and let you know before you really get invested if this is someone you could build a future with or just a fun fling.
Communicating isn’t just talking about what you like to do for fun or determining if you guys have the same interest you must go deeper than that to build a strong, serious connection. Talk about how you feel about commitment and cheating, discuss the issues you see in other relationships and how’d react and handle certain situations. Establishing how things make you feel and what you are and aren’t willing to deal with will help your potential partner understand you and his or her responses will help you decide if you should give it shot or get outta there as fast as possible.
Now, I’m gonna say this loud and clear for everyone *clears throat* DON’T MAKE THINGS ABOUT SEX! While sex is going to be a part of any relationship it honestly doesn’t need to be the first, second, or third thing you guys talk about. Building a relationship solely off physical attraction is a recipe for disaster.
In an article on Psychology Today, Clinical Phycologist and author, Jill P. Weber said, “If you are hoping that a sexual relationship will eventually lead to a more emotionally intimate or committed relationship, cease and desist: Research shows relationships that start with sex before emotional intimacy is present typically do not become committed unions.”
Source: Giphy
Looks and physical aspects only satisfy a rather minor part of relationships. 3 months in when they start getting on your nerves and you realize you guys have only been having small talk and joking about whatever was trending on twitter that day, you’ll realize the sex wasn’t that great.
The beginning stages of a relationship are major in solidifying its future. You wouldn’t build a house without making sure it had a proper secure foundation so don’t build something in your heart without doing the same.