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It’s Okay to Be Sad and Single on Valentine’s Day

The day we single ladies have all been dreading: Valentine’s Day.

Every year for the so-called day of love (excluding the two years I was actually in a relationship), I’ve successfully put on quite a “Pssh! Oh yeah, I’m doing just fine!” show for the world. One peculiar time I went to go see a slasher (psychopath horror) film with a group of my buds. Another year I was abroad in Switzerland and instagrammed a semi-salty but hilarious picture of Liz Lemon embracing her amour for food. And this year, as I prepped for a “Galentine’s Day” (Leslie Knope would approve), I had an epiphany: It’s okay to be a bit bummed on Valentine’s Day. I mean, the lovey-dovey pink and red day is pretty much stacked against us. Ever since we were little girls, we watched Disney shows involving some cliched scene where one character impassionedly declares his/her flaming love, the episode ending with a sweet V-Day slow dance. We’ve been exposed to the ideal image of what Valentine’s Day should be like, so of course then, when we don’t reach the giant teddy bears and love in the air standard, we’re a bit bummed out.  In reality, I think the real problem arises when we feel pressured to “act cool or laid back” with the fact that the love arrow didn’t strike us on Valentine’s Day.

Each year I pretend to be completely unaffected. I play it off as if I’m not in the middle of pondering to text my ex-boyfriend (Yikes) or that I don’t mind the fact that I’ve been scrolling past couple dedication posts on Instagram for an hour. But you know what? Despite my efforts, every time I’m still sad when I’m alone in my room and the clock strikes midnight. So my point is, enough with the bluffing: I’m obviously not too happy to be, yet again, without my Prince Charming on V-day. I’m also guessing that many of you reading this post now aren’t either. If you aren’t down in the dumps about this, kudos to you, care to share your secret with the rest of us? That takes some serious self-assuredness, good for you. But for the majority of us single gals who do feel crummy, here’s a proposition: Let’s stop acting like everything is chocolate dipped cherries and wine. Chances are, breaking the barrier of shame and opening up about how we actually feel may elicit deeper conversations that are meaningful. I don’t know about you, but I would choose a light hearted chat and a glass of wine with my single ladies any day over make-out sessions with super drunk creepers at the end of the bar.

Once you and your girls wipe the plastic smiles off your faces and instead, really enjoy and embrace the love you DO have in your life, your day just might brighten up. Let’s stop fixating and obsessing on the love that hasn’t entered our lives yet. Who knows, maybe you’re Cupid’s next target, and he’s been waiting all along to strike at the perfect time. And if he isn’t, there are always plenty of snuggly bulldogs in the world to cuddle with instead.

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