You caught the attention of a lucky guy this summer. What started off as a summer fling blossomed into a wonderful new relationship. There’s only one problem: He attends school 1,000 miles away from you and the school year has just begun.
As someone who has been in a long distance relationship for over a year, I understand how hard the last goodbye can be and the uncertainty that comes with being so far away from the person you love. You often wonder, “Can it really work?” The answer is…YES! It takes time, energy, and commitment but it definitely can pay off in the end. Here’s how you and your guy can combat typical problems long distance relationship couples face and ultimately make it work. Don’t give up, ladies!
1. Problem: Jealousy
Solution: Communicate boundaries
One of the biggest, if not the biggest, problems couples face is jealously. If you or your man hide things from one another or forget to set boundaries, your relationship is on the path to failure. Make sure to establish both of your definitions of “acceptable behavior”–is flirting or dancing with a guy okay? What does he think? Make sure you both are on the same page.
2. Problem: Missing In-Person Contact
Solution: Skype
Airline tickets aren’t cheap, which means you can’t fly to see him every weekend. Coordinate your school schedules and find time to Skype a couple times a week. Nothing can replace being with your guy in-person, but being able to see and talk to him feels like you two are hanging out.
3. Problem: Temptation
Solution: Be an Awesome ‘Wing woman’
Let’s start by saying this: You are not a terrible person if you find another guy attractive while in a relationship. For example, Ryan Gosling does not stop being hot once you are dating someone. To avoid the temptation to flirt, make it your mission to be the designated ‘wing woman’ of your friend group. It sounds boring, but it actually can be kind of fun (and gives you an excuse to let your eyes wander!).
4. Problem: Growing Apart
Solution: Pursue Common Interests
Now that you two aren’t physically together, it can be a little hard finding things to talk about. It may feel like you are growing apart or are having a lot of awkward silent moments on Skype. Don’t freak out, it happens! Find a movie you both have wanted to watch, see it separately, and talk about it over Skype or a phone call. If movies aren’t your thing, find something you both enjoy.
5. Problem: Conflicting Schedules
Solution: Keep Yourself Busy
Sometimes you or your guy’s schedules don’t match. It happens, but keep your mind off missing him by hanging out with friends and staying busy. Don’t let his schedule get in the way of doing your own thing. His schedule should never dictate yours. It’s okay if you don’t talk to each other every day.
You’re in college to learn and have fun FIRST! If having a long distance boyfriend becomes a burden, it’s time to call it quits and find a new catch.
Image Credit: Flickr
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