Dear men, we love you, we care for you and we support you. However, we do want you to know that we genuinely want all of the below from you as well:
1.We love having space just as much as you do
Here’s the truth gentlemen: we, ladies, absolutely adore having space just as much as you do. Not having to shave our legs for a day, sipping mock cocktails with our girlfriends and talking about the latest Scream Queens episode is almost like a day of paradise for us. This doesn’t necessarily mean we absolutely don’t enjoy spending time with you. We really do. However, we do long for our days of privacy where we can gossip over the latest food or hunk obsession with our best friends. Think of it as our spa days.
2. We are equally afraid of commitment and intimacy as you
This might surprise you but we are equally as uncomfortable as you are when to comes to defining our relationship. We know that becoming someone’s girlfriend is a serious commitment, which requires a lot of dedication on our part. Whilst you may think that most of us are naturals at this, we actually aren’t.
We are always second-guessing our choices, trying to figure out when’s the perfect time for intimacy and wondering whether you’re on board the same train as us. It can be a pretty scary thought knowing our single days are nearly over.
3. We don’t appreciate you keeping secrets from your past or present from us
That ex-girlfriend you had sex with? That crazy party you went with your guy friends that you casually forgot to tell us about? Don’t hide it from us.
We eventually end up finding out everything and most of the time, the after effects of unveiling secrets are largely unpleasant for you and us. We won’t only ponder over why you hid it from us but we will also go over every single moment in the relationship where you could have lied, and become frustrated over it.
And truly, “hell hath no fury like a woman scorned”. So don’t keep secrets from us.
4. We are not all hearts and flowers
Most of the time, we are associated with hearts, flowers, the color pink and being overemotional. The truth couldn’t be further from that.
Every single one of us is a different type of woman and we expect you to observe what we like, rather than confine us into one of those female stereotypes. You may think all of us are fans of roses. However, some of us may prefer baseball games or a classy dinner to flowers.
Ultimately, the key is to genuinely observe what we like and show us that you can see it. We love that.
5. We didn’t friend zone you because you aren’t hot enough
We didn’t friend zone you because you don’t fit the jock stereotype. We friend zoned you because we value our friendship with you and we genuinely feel you are more inclined to be our brother, than our boyfriend. You may hate it and think we aren’t appreciative of you.
However, we are. Throughout the day, we will most likely call you for advice, tell you about our day and even have fun memories. At the end, our friendship with you will triumph many other things in our lives.
6. We would genuinely like you to organize the next date
Many times, you may presume that we would like full control over the next date. However, we genuinely DON’T. Planning a date is extremely stressful, from picking the right venue down to picking the time. We would much rather, in all honesty, sleep or catch up on the next streaming of Pretty Little Liars.
What we would love to see you do is take ownership of the date with us. Suggest possible places, times and even arrange it all for us. Surprise us, if you feel like it! Nothing makes a girl more impressed than having a boyfriend with impeccable planning skills.
7. We get jealous and argue with you because we care
Nothing riles us up faster than knowing you potentially met an ex-girlfriend or school hottie without our knowledge. We will get jealous and the chances are we will most likely end up arguing heatedly with you over it. However, that doesn’t mean we want full possession over you or not support the idea of you having a little freedom.
We get jealous because we truly do care about you and are wondering whether our intentions align perfectly with yours or not. We care because we want to be the best we can be for you and are insecure on whether our feelings are actually being reciprocated.
8. We want you to fight for us and respect our feelings
Most of the time, we may end up feeling like the relationship is completely one-sided and will need you to remind us why we agreed to start the relationship in the first place.
Fight for us. Discuss your feelings. Observe our feelings and respect them.
Many men think that by being Byronic (moodily seductive) or by being the bad boy, we will continue to stick by them because we love those ‘types’. Wrong. We may decide to stick by you but we will eventually get tired of having to continuously carry on the relationship by ourselves. And believe us, you will never want us to give up on you.
9. We would love it if you could treat us equally to your mum or sister
If you can never imagine doing something hurtful to your mother or sister, then you shouldn’t do it to us, too. We’re just like your mother and sister, save the familial relations. However, that doesn’t mean we don’t want to be treated equally. We really do. We expect you to treat us right and care for us. Just because we are your girlfriends or friends doesn’t mean we are second in nature to the main women in your lives.
10. We will support you wholeheartedly if you respect our values and friends
No matter what, we will end up introducing you to our best friends and regardless of whether you both get along or not, we expect you to respect them because they are our best friends. You don’t have to agree with everything they say but we won’t tolerate any badmouthing about them. The same applies for our values.
With feminism catapulting these days, some of us would like to split the bill halfway, give our kids our family’s names and even be the one to drive the car to our dates. If you respect our values and our friends, we will support and love you wholeheartedly, in a superwoman-esque manner. All the way.