If you have an Instagram account, which, unless you have been living under a rock for the last ten years, I assume you do, you will have noticed people putting their pronouns in their bios. Pronouns such as ‘she/her’ and ‘he/him’ we are certainly familiar with, however, some people have ‘they/them’ or ‘she/they’ for example, which you may not recognise.
They or them pronouns can be used when people feel as though they do not fit into one gender in particular; by doing so, they have more freedom in expression that is not restricted to either gender. This can be a form of protest against societies double standards or expectations of gender, i.e., Girls are expected to shave their legs and other body hair and men are expected to be hypermasculine. By not identifying with either gender, they also do not identify with any expectations or stereotypes, and therefore can do and be whoever they choose.
Using they or them may seem a bit confusing at first; what if someone thinks you’re referring to a group of people? Just think of it as referring to someone whose gender you do not know. For instance, if you were discussing a police offer, a gender-neutral term is used, in which you would not be able to determine their gender. You would say ‘they are walking around’, rather than ‘she is walking around’, as you would not want to presume their gender. This is not dissimilar to asking someone of their pronouns, so you would not misgender them and assume how they identify.
Putting your pronouns in your Instagram bio is a way of solidifying your support as an ally or as a member of the LBTQ+ community. Allies who put their pronouns in their bio, at the end of their emails, or just generally express them in conversation, help to normalise asserting your pronouns to avoid being misgendered, making social media, which for some can be quite scary, a safe space for expression. It’s an easy, free way to express your support and can make more of a difference than you realise.
There is often a negative stigma around asserting your pronouns, with internet memes hurtfully dismissing them and normalising this through as many people as possible stating their pronouns, it makes it all a little easier for those who need it! Additionally, unfortunately, there are people online who target transgender people; so by cisgender people putting their pronouns in their bios etc., it can form as a protective barrier against this hatred, as they cannot determine who is transgender and who is an ally. Transgender hate crimes are an ongoing issue in the UK, with the number of transgender hate crimes rising by 81% (BBC, 2017), so helping trans people to feel more accepted and comfortable is the bare minimum that cisgender people can do at this stage.
Being misgendered as a transgender person can be incredibly hurtful; many trans people suffer from body dysmorphia and struggle with being seen as valid. I am a cisgender woman, which means I used the pronouns assigned to me at birth, and have never been misgendered, so I can never truly understand what it feels like to be, however by practising these things (however small they may seem) it can truly help others.
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