Ever since I could put pen to paper and scribble down words in a somewhat legible way, I have kept a journal. At age 6, this consisted of butterfly drawings, surprisingly profound thoughts on the dysfunctional relationship of Troy Bolton and Gabriella Montez, and strange questionnaires I would make my aunties and uncles fill out when they came over for a cuppa, interrogating them on their favourite colour and breed of dog. At age 9, my muse was the playground drama, my puppy love crush, and the gut-wrenching heartache I experienced when he said he simply couldn’t be with me due to the fact I had eczema. At age 12, my diary saw me dramatically declare ‘today I became a woman’ on the day I got my first period. At age 14, I drafted out a lengthy peacemaking message I was going to send to the group chat after a big friendship fallout. At age 16, I expressed how uncomfortable and unhappy I was with the way my body was filling out and transforming. At age 18, I documented my disbelief as the COVID-19 pandemic unfolded and recorded everything I was forced to find out about myself while we were shut off from one another. I have packed up my life into the journals I have kept, and they have watched me grow up. So, at age 20, when I gave up writing my diary after an ex-boyfriend told me he’d been reading it, I felt lost for months.
When that relationship ended, I cracked open the spine of a brand-new journal. Externalising my thoughts onto the page is the only way I know how to process anything. I felt like I was back in touch with a childhood friend, and I felt like me again.
The best thing you can do for your mental health is take up journaling. It’s the first piece of advice I give to any of my friends going through a hard time, and it has made a colossal difference to my happiness. The list of benefits is endless; journaling can help you destress and relax in times of tension, solve problems and create action plans, and improve your relationships with others. You get to know yourself, your emotions and what triggers them, your values and what’s truly important to you, what you really like or dislike (not just what you’re told to like or dislike), how your past experiences shape your current behaviours, what makes you happy, your needs, your goals and your whole identity.
Journaling can mean so many things to so many different people. You don’t have to recount every detail of your day or pour your heart out. You can write out a poem, or your current playlist, or a stream of consciousness, or lists of things you’re grateful for. You can scrapbook, or just rant. There’s no correct way to journal – it just depends on what you want to get out of it, whether you’re looking for an outlet to decode your dilemmas or a time capsule of all the things you want to be able to reminisce on.
There should also be no pressure! The main culprit for abandoning this wonderful habit is draining all the enjoyment from it by forcing yourself to write when you’re just not feeling it, or getting frustrated that not every page is neat and aesthetically pleasing. Whatever form your journal takes will be a brilliantly unique ode to the current version of you, and allowing yourself to escape perfectionism is part of its romance.
I’ve compiled a list of prompts that you can start with if you’re stuck on what to write about. Pull on the fuzzy socks, light some candles, brew a herbal tea and whip out an empty notebook:
- What things do you want to learn more about?
- Questions for future you to answer in a year’s time.
- What are your non-negotiables in a relationship?
- What are the most valuable lessons your Mother has taught you?
- Do you have any regrets?
- What is your love language?
- What makes you anxious?
- What is a boundary you need to work on enforcing?
- What makes you ecstatic?
- Who are the most important people in your life?
- When was the last time you cried? Why?
- What is your biggest secret?
- What can you do today for your future self?
- What are your values?
- When were you the proudest of yourself?
- What lessons have you learned this year?
- Is there anything in your current life you wish to change?
- What are your thoughts on social media?
- What would you tell your younger self?
- What would you like to incorporate more of in your life?
- What do you need less of in your life?
- Do you believe that people can change?
- What do you need to let go of?
- What is your favourite thing about each of your friends?
- How do you cope with stress?
- What things are you good at?
- What is your ideal day?
- What topics of conversation make you uncomfortable? Why?
- Do you prioritise yourself or people-please?
- Where is your favourite place in the world?
- Do you like your daily routine?
- What are you grateful for?
- What are your vices?
- What do you love about yourself?
- What are you insecure about?
- What is something you need to hear right now?
- What has been your favourite age so far?
- Who inspires you?
- What is holding you back?
- How is your mental health today?
- Are you a different person when you’re in a relationship?
- What is the hardest thing you have been through?
- Is there anyone you are angry at?
- How would you like people to perceive you?
- What are some things you want to teach your future children?
- What is your favourite season?
- What are you excited for?
- Do you miss anybody?
- When was the last time you did something for the first time?
- How well do you handle change?