We often search the world for role models, yet the ones who shape us the most are often the ones quietly standing beside us – the women who raised us.
This March, as the world celebrates International Women’s Month, I find myself thinking about the women who have quietly shaped every part of who I am. Not the celebrities or famous figures whose lives appear perfect in magazines, but the women I’ve grown up with; the ones whose laughter, courage, and unwavering love have guided me through life’s messiness.
Often, we overlook those who quietly instil in us the strength, courage, and compassion that define who we are. We live in a society obsessed with imitation and external validation, constantly searching for role models in faraway places while forgetting the women who have stood beside us, guiding us without fanfare. For me, those role models have always been closer than I realised, my family, my teachers, my mentors,extraordinary women whose influence is woven into every decision I make, every challenge I face, and every dream I pursue.
I am privileged to have grown up with both Polish and Irish heritage, raised by women whose personalities are as diverse as they are extraordinary. From the outside, my family may seem unusual (loud, opinionated, and fiercely individual) yet together, they have pieced together the best parts of me. I am the first in my family to pursue a master’s degree, and I have been given opportunities I never imagined possible because of the example set by these women: their humour, their courage, and their unwavering support.
From kitchen karaoke sessions, screeching the wrong lyrics to ABBA songs, to witnessing their resilience and determination, I realise how rarely I have paused to truly appreciate the remarkable women around me -women who have shown me what I can achieve when I put my mind to it.
My mum is assertiveness embodied. As a family support worker, she provides care not only to children, but to parents, colleagues, and the wider community. Recently, she received an award on behalf of her school for her tireless contributions and dedication. After completing work experience at her primary school this past year, my admiration for her deepened even further. She is a force to be reckoned with, balancing deep compassion with a fiercely protective instinct. She has fearlessly stood up for children who might otherwise have been overlooked, testifying on their behalf and ensuring every child feels loved and supported regardless of their circumstances. Where others might remain silent, she speaks. Her unwavering belief in doing what is right, regardless of popularity or approval, has guided me not only in moments of confidence but in times when I have felt small or afraid. Whether she realises it or not, her resilience and courage have helped me navigate difficult situations and relationships alike.
If my mum taught me courage, my gran taught me diplomacy and quiet self-confidence. Despite her 4’11” frame, my gran is one of the most respected women I know. Within her community, she is a trusted adviser, friend, and confidant. Strangers often stop me to ask if I am Sheila’s granddaughter – a question I answer with immense pride. She seems to be known by almost everyone in the local vicinity, and for good reason. Her cutting humour is matched by her diplomatic strength. She offers advice with care and firmness, standing her ground while maintaining warmth and grace. She is never boastful, yet her quiet self-confidence and belief in her ability to endure life’s challenges have left a lasting impression on me. An advisor and trusted companion to many, my grandmother’s enduring care and sense of diplomacy in even the hardest situations would put politicians to shame. She speaks with confidence, listening carefully to others’ perspectives to offer sound advice or support to those in need.
My aunties, though different in personality, each possess qualities that have shaped my understanding of strength and empathy. Anna, a senior nurse in a children’s palliative care hospice, works in an environment many would find overwhelming. Yet whenever she speaks about her work, her face lights up as she describes the children and families she supports. Her nurturing and caring personality has comforted countless families during the hardest moments of their lives. Most people in her role would risk becoming pessimistic, but Anna radiates hope. Despite being told to give up on her dream of becoming a nurse as a young girl, she persevered, and now not only provides care but inspires others, colleagues and patients alike, to approach their work with the same compassion and dedication. Her resilience and empathy are extraordinary, and her ability to transform grief into care leaves a lasting mark on everyone she touches.
Barbs, my dad’s sister, has a gift for seeing the extraordinary in ordinary moments. Despite losing her father at a young age, she never lost her spark of fun and playfulness. Her creativity and warmth shine in her work caring for adults with severe autism and learning disabilities. Her bubbly personality transforms every gathering into a celebration. She has a rare ability to turn everyday moments into memories filled with humour and joy, captivating everyone around her with her wit and imagination. In her job, she doesn’t just care -she creates magic, using her creativity to make life brighter for the people she serves. Her energy, optimism, and light-heartedness have taught me that joy and laughter can exist even in challenging circumstances.
Abi, once cabin crew, was awarded a medal by the Queen for her bravery in helping passengers evacuate a crash-landed plane at Heathrow. Despite setbacks that might have defeated anyone else, she rises again, embodying resilience and courage. She has lived through experiences I once thought impossible, yet she transforms hardship into learning, and challenge into growth. Abi has always been a listening ear, a steady source of perspective, and a model of optimism in the face of adversity. Her resilience, and her ability to thrive because of it, is extraordinary. The stories she could tell could fill an entire drama series, yet her sense of self and unwavering positivity remain intact.
While these women have achieved impressive professional success, what inspires me most is not their careers but their character. It is not what we do for a living that shines brightest, it is the way we show up for others.
Despite occasional bickers and frustrations, this International Women’s Month I am proud to be shaped by women who taught me not only right from wrong, but what it truly means to be myself. Public figures may serve as role models to many, but few could capture the spirit, warmth, and strength of the feminine energy that raised me. Awards or grand gestures of significance aren’t needed when observing the often quiet inspiration I am surrounded by. Every so often, I catch myself mirroring the actions of my relatives. In those moments, I feel a quiet relief, knowing that I am carrying forward the positive influences they have instilled in me, hoping to carry them with me for the rest of my life.
For better, and very, very, occasionally for worse, these women helped shape the woman I am today. From once feeling ashamed of being the girl with the “funny” Polish name, I am learning to embrace who I am. I am still a work in progress, but through their guidance and support, I now understand that the women who raised me gave me more than advice or encouragement. They gave me courage, laughter, and a blueprint for strength. They showed me that being a woman is not just about existing in the world, but about shaping it with compassion, resilience, and joy. And because of them, I carry their spirit with me every day – ready to face life, stand tall, and leave a mark that honours everything they taught me.
Because of them, I approach challenges not with fear, but with curiosity, courage, and hope. They have given me a blueprint for strength, laughter, and joy and the belief that I can achieve anything when I put my mind to it. And this International Women’s Month, I celebrate them: the women who raised me, shaped me, and continue to inspire every part of who I am.