That is, until last year. Last year I got proactive. I had been dating my boyfriend for a year and I encouraged him to plan something. I didn’t make the plans myself, I didn’t take away the glory of a guy planning the perfect night, but I did ensure that I would finally have a Valentine’s Day. It was one of the most romantic nights of my life. We had a great dinner, we watched When Harry Met Sally and just enjoyed one another’s company. It didn’t take much to make it a great night.
And so, this year I find myself conflicted. On one hand, I have nothing against Valentine’s Day anymore. I can absolutely see why people like it so much. It is tailor-made for romance- restaurants have special menus for the night, CVS has rows and rows of candy and Hallmark has the cards ready, making it easy for even the least romantic guy to be charming, at least to me.
However, I still wonder what the point is. I think it’s a great time to celebrate the people you love, even the ones you don’t love that way. But the hype and the allusion of romance for one night puts a lot of pressure on all of us. For weeks we stress about what the big plans will be. Those of us who are single worry that there will be nobody to be with, if it’s complicated so is navigating February 14th and for those lucky enough to be in relationships it’s hard to figure out how to kick up the romance for just one night. And all so we can feel extra super loved for a night? Really?
On February 14, 2012 I will be having a romantic date with my best girlfriends, and I don’t feel bad about it. This year I have given little thought to having a man involved in my night. I am excited to celebrate how loved I am and how much I love the people who have been there for me consistently, no matter what. So when you start to worry that your Valentine’s Day won’t be filled with romance this year, consider what romance really means. We all know it’s about love, but I’m starting to think it isn’t about being with someone who will give you a goodnight kiss. It might be about being with the people who care about you the most, and the best.