I have been a suburban girl all my life. I never imagined myself living anywhere else, and quite honestly, I didn’t think I could handle it. Growing up sheltered from the world, I was never able to experience life to the fullest extent. To put things into perspective, my small town of Ridgefield, Connecticut, has a population of 7,103 people. The town is predominantly white, and as an Asian girl, you can imagine that I struggled to fit in. My parents worked hard to make sure that I was dressed properly, said the right things and acted appropriately. They didn’t want me to stand out any more than I already did. After experiencing some bullying in elementary and middle school, I became more cautious about who I interacted with and how I behaved both in school and in public. Things started to improve at the end of middle school, and when I entered high school, I found a group of friends who accepted me for who I was.
When it came time to apply to colleges, I knew that I didn’t want history to repeat itself; I needed to break free from suburban life and try something new. Years of suffocation left me longing for somewhere completely different. I ultimately ended up in Boston, and I immediately fell in love with the atmosphere here. The city was exactly what I needed, with its diverse community, plethora of eateries and endless fun activities. Once I officially moved in, I fell even more deeply in love with Boston, feeling refreshed by the change of scenery.
During my freshman year, I lived in a 6-person suite, with a forced double room. It was absolutely awful — 6 girls versus one bathroom. I needed to find ways to cope with this unfamiliar experience and the feeling of homesickness. The adjustment was rough, and I definitely doubted my ability to handle the situation. I should preface this by saying that I had rarely done anything by myself before. Back home, if I went to get food, I would always have someone accompany me so I didn’t have to awkwardly stand alone in line. So, independently eating out for the first time in college was genuinely a huge accomplishment for me. These solo trips were also a great excuse to escape my cramped dorm and try new eateries that I didn’t have access to previously.
At home, I drove everywhere. Walking wasn’t really an option, and there was no public transportation in my little town. Boston, in contrast, is incredibly walkable. At first, I found walking alone super awkward because I didn’t have anyone to talk to. I listened to music, but I still felt uncomfortable, like something was missing. Over time, I have grown to conquer this fear, and knowing that everyone else does it too puts my mind at ease. I now fit in a “hot girl walk” any chance that I get, especially since the weather has warmed up. It’s such a great way to decompress and reset.
Boston is such an independent city. There are endless things you can do on your own, and sometimes, that sense of solidarity is exactly what you need. Spending time with myself has helped me gain a great deal of confidence and discover who I am as a person. I am thankful to Boston for being such an important part of my journey of development. All of these little accomplishments give me a boost to continue challenging myself and stepping out of my comfort zone. Sometimes, a little discomfort is exactly what you need to become a stronger person. Perhaps most people don’t need to hear this, but as we’ve established, I’m not like most people who were raised in urban settings. I have learned a lot during my two years in Boston: I know how to take the T, eat by myself and enjoy my own company. I am not dependent on anyone else because I’ve become more in tune with myself, and I hope this inspires you to cultivate a relationship with yourself and continually find new ways to grow.