Writing Bad Poetry

Sometimes writing bad poetry is a good way of forcing you feelings out onto a page rather than another person. I wrote these two poems shortly after a really difficult break up. They aren’t amazing but they have meaning to me and I am happy to be able to share them. Maybe in the future, if you have negative feelings try writing them in the form of poetry, turn it into a creative outlet. I write them in a journal, something about the connection of pen to paper is very gratifying.   

The Waves

The waves crash against my mind

Waves of never ending sorrow

I venture down to the coast 

Down to the rocky shores of my thoughts

And there, I find that nothing but time will heal me. 

Just as time pushes the water closer and closer to town

Just as time smoothes out the jagged rocks

Just as time grows a pearl in a sensitive oyster

You have invaded my joyful thought and turned them sour

In an era of online dating 

I realise that I am never alone, and

Yet I am increasingly lonely.

So to push out the sadness

I venture down to the sea and I find myself wanting to run

Away from the pressure and the increasing negativity

I am no longer willing, I think, to heal.

It is easier, being in pain

It is simpler to cry

It fills my thoughts and for a pessimist like me, its unstoppable

Because when you go down to the sea,

Your thoughts, your mind, your fears and your hopes

All pushed against the brims of your skull

They invade your very being

You do everything you can to avoid the rising conflict

Attempting to build an impregnable fortress, 

You have but one choice. 

To give in.

The Tsunami of emotions cannot be stopped

And you can no longer move in land.

For it is too late.

You must face your feelings

And so you do, but with closed arms.

You say to yourself, that you’ll simply be okay.

Those closed arms of yours block out all the light.

By closing your arms, you don’t truly welcome the time it takes to heal.

By closing your arms you are instinctively protecting your heart

By closing your arms you try to block the waves.

They may not be soft

They may not be rough

They may be the greatest force you have ever felt.

An Ending not Wanted

My feelings stopped flowing

In all that had been ignored.

I forgot I wasn’t showing

And all that was in my core.

Our love isn’t exchanging

I wouldn’t be the one to lose

Instead, all that’s left is blaming

And you’re the one I choose.

Like how we pick our pets

Or animals decide their mate

I wanted it to be set

And for it to be our fate

I’ve told too many “lies”

Hidden too many truths

Mistakes to go along with sighs.

I should open a kissing booth.

What lies have you told,

One of lost love?

I have to say, frustration is old.

Give me a list, all of the above.

Have you really not been happy?

Or have your best friends changed you?

It’s turned me all sappy

So, get a fucking clue.

 How many times have I escaped this?

Reality shows that it’ll happen.

My gut has never dodged its fist

Just read the damn caption.

It’s something I’ve never wavered.

Kids aren’t something to think,

A family can’t be measured,

Marriage isn’t just a blink.

I love you, I better

It isn’t all corpust 

Just all those things together

It’s not something discussed.

Photograph by Mira Rector

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