Everyone’s journey through the battles, losses and victories of life have been impacted by “Sweet Pandemonium.” Throughout my adolescence, my teenage years and even into my adult years I have encountered this pandemonium. My teenage years were my passage from childhood to adult. I began to question my place in society and what I had to offer. I have felt lost, confused and fearing I would never see the light at the end of the tunnel.
According to Merriam-Webster Word Central, the Etymology of pandemonium comes from “Pandemonium, name of the place of demons in Paradise Lost by John Milton, from Greek pan- ‘all, every, completely’ and Greek daimon ‘evil spirit, demon’ and is also defined as “a wild uproar: TUMULT (a great confusion of mind)”.
My discovery of the band, HIM, and hearing their song, “Sweet Pandemonium” (from their album, Love Metal), let me know that I was not the only person in the world battling demons. Ville Valo’s (the vocalist and song writer) deep and mellow voice and lyrics along with Linde’s (the guitarist) rhythm allured me. I believed Valo was also searching for “the truth that could set souls free” in his personal “Sweet Pandemonium” (Valo, 2011, track 4). I yearned for my soul to be liberated from confusion and demons. Listening to the song allowed me freedom from judgements, depression, stress and “anger and grief” (Valo, 2011, track 4). Love proved to be stronger than my demons.
Beginning college at eighteen years old was one important commencement into adulthood and independence. My ten-year voyage of earning a Bachelor’s degree had many bumps in the road (minor and tragic), but I refused to give into the temptation of quitting. I changed my major twice until I found a degree that suited me: Women’s Studies. The courses, professors and my classmates opened my mind and soul to how to unbury “the truth” of life (Valo, 2011, track 4). Although society has been conditioned into the oppressions of Patriarchy, sexism, racism, homophobia, heterosexism, classism, ableism, colorism, etc., the Women’s Studies program taught me ways to unveil the “riddle” in “sweet pandemonium” (Valo, 2011, track 4). How is oppression still thriving in society? How can all of the demons of oppression be defeated?
As a Graduate student, a writer for Her Campus, and a member of SARJ (Student Alliance for Reproductive Justice) I have paved new expeditions for myself. I am learning how to use my passions of writing, Reproductive Justice, and social justice for all in my everyday life and in future careers. I hope to educate others on why and how equality has not been fulfilled and how to make changes to benefit everyone. I aim to further educate myself and others about Reproductive Justice and all (heterosexual, bisexual, Lesbian, pansexual, transwomen, etc.) women’s right to health care. I do not want to be “Afraid that everything remains unchanged In this fragile dream, Ashamed of the shattered remains Of promises made” (Valo, 2011, track 4). Fear refrains society from making changes and acceptance.
If I ever have the opportunity to meet Ville Valo, I would thank him for his music; specifically, his lyrics. Without Valo and the remaining members of HIM, and other bands who have influenced my life, I doubt I would be passionate about my creative writing and making changes in society. Valo’s lyrics have taught me that I can question myself, my surroundings and the mysteries life flings at me. I hope my writing will influence someone they way I have been someday. Maybe even Valo will become a fan of my writing and be inspired.
Below, I have provided the lyrics to “Sweet Pandemonium” and a YouTube video of the song.
“Sweet Pandemonium”
Today tomorrow seems so far away
And the wait in vain, yeah
So safe, in the blinding light of love unchained
In yesterday’s grave, yeah
The truth that could set souls free
Is buried within sweet pandemonium
Concealed by disbelief
The riddle stays veiled in sweet pandemonium
Afraid that everything remains unchanged
In this fragile dream, yeah
Ashamed of the shattered remains
Of promises made, yeah
The truth that could set souls free
Is buried within sweet pandemonium
Concealed by disbelief
The riddle stays veiled in sweet pandemonium
Drained by the anger and grief
Fazed by the envy and greed
The secret cries for a release
The lucidity hidden deep in sweet pandemonium
The truth that could set souls free
Is buried within sweet pandemonium
Concealed by disbelief
The riddle stays veiled in sweet pandemonium