Loving Yourself Means Taking a Break

As the first month of school is wrapping up, you might be feeling a bit overwhelmed. A new school year means it’s time to make new friends and get reacquainted with the people you haven’t seen all summer. It’ll take some time getting used to new classes, professors, and roommates. Now look, I don't doubt your “adulting” abilities, but, we’re all human, so we’re bound to feel stressed at some point.

Whether you are a freshman starting college (like me) or you’re a returning student, you're most likely busy meeting new people. But, introducing yourself for the fifth time in a day may get annoying. Personally, I feel like there’s nothing more unauthentic than having to introduce yourself. When you first meet a person, it feels as though you're walking on landmines because you don't know how they’ll react to the next thing that comes out of your mouth.

We're aware that we’re supposed to make new friends. That’s how life is, right? Just because we're expected to be doing something doesn't mean we have to do it 24/7. Sometimes you should take a step away from playing “adult,” and regress a little. Yes, I said regress and not progress. New York is impatient, and people walk faster than cars can drive. You probably moved here or decided to study in the city because you enjoy this fast lifestyle. We want to eat new food, create new memories, and meet new people. We can't wait to be done with one thing so that we can move on to the next. Since we live in a time that is constantly striving to progress, it makes us feel guilty whenever we stop to take a little break.

I know regression is listed as one of Freud’s seven defense mechanisms, so it may not be the most useful sounding piece of advice. Your body naturally practices these defense mechanisms unconsciously. So, allow me to bring it to your awareness. Nowadays, people hear the words: unconscious, repression, and Freud and then they immediately relate it to sex and daddy issues. But I stand by my boy Sigmund on this point. He can’t be all wrong, because after all, defense mechanisms are programmed to help you deal with stress. Although, contrary to the usual defense mechanisms that Freud mentioned, there are healthier and tamer ways to regress than crying and throwing tantrums. Instead of actually acting like a child, take my advice to regress as a pause from being an adult. It's time to slow down for once. Let’s take a break from socializing.

Whether you have always been independent or you were best friends with your mom, it’s time to call home. Call up your folks. Tell them how you’re doing. Ask them how they're doing. Also, calling “home” doesn’t have to mean family members. Just because you have new friends doesn't mean you should forget about your old ones. Those are the people who have been there with you through your hormonal and irrational years, a.k.a high school. Don't just do phone calls either, FaceTime them too. You’d be surprised at how much people can change physically and mentally in short periods of time. Keep in contact with the close friends you made throughout your life, even if you've moved away. Connections and relationships require you to put in a lot of effort. Just because you are geographically far away doesn’t mean that you have to be mentally distant from your friends.

So, there you have it; that’s the first piece of advice I will share with you. Take good care of yourself in this busy, fast-moving city. You know this cliché quote if you’ve watched "Ferris Bueller’s Day Off": “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” So, don't force yourself to socialize, let it happen naturally. Humans are social creatures, but everyone needs rest at some point. 

 

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