Of all the transitions we make from high school to college, living in a dorm has to be the biggest one. Take it from me. One year ago I was a freshman cooped up in a forced triple with two completely different roommates: One who I became great friends with, and another who I, well, didn’t. My roommate and I escaped triple-life only to spend our second semester in a suite that was smelly, flooded, and often trashed.
Finding a living situation that works for you can often take more than one shot, and the first year of dorming doesn’t always go smoothly. Many incoming students find roommates over Facebook or during their orientation programs, but even those seemingly perfect matches can have their flaws. In any case, being thrown into a crammed living space with people from different backgrounds and accustomed to different lifestyles can produce a whole spectrum of issues. Suddenly you have to confront these people when things go wrong– and oh, how wrong they can go.
“My first roommate would go to bed as I was waking up at 8 a.m. and would let her friends come in the room while I was sleeping,” said sophomore Katherine Leonard.
Unfortunately, Leonard had to deal with an inconsiderate roommate her entire first semester before switching rooms. She constantly dealt with her roommate’s antics. As a new student just getting acclimated to college life, this living situation is stressful and frustrating.
This year the college requires freshman to live only in corridor halls, which can be nerve-wracking, especially if you’re one of the lucky ones who gets put in a triple. How do you deal with a whole floor of girls sharing a bathroom? What if your neighbors are noisy? Or if you and your roommates don’t get along and have to share that one tiny room all semester?
“I’ve heard so many stories about terrible roommates and since I was being assigned mine randomly, I feared this would be the case,” said freshman Cameron DeSteno.
But worry not, freshman. Not all first-year students have a hard time dealing with dorm-life. For every bad roommate story, I’ve also heard a good one. While it can often be a gamble on how your situation will play out, many students have pleasant experiences.
For sophomore Dana Liuzzi, dorming was not a problem at all. Her and her roommate had lifestyles and habits that worked well with each other which made things run smoothly. While the two didn’t spend all of their time together, they always had each other to talk to.
“You don’t have to be best friends to be good roommates,” Liuzzi said.
Yet her point oftentimes gets overlooked. When choosing roommates for the first time, we tend to choose those who share an interest in our favorite band, and not our bedtime. We choose the person who we could see ourselves being best friends with, not being roommates with. It all comes down to establishing good communication with the people you’re living with. Good roommate relationships can result from getting a completely random roommate, too. You just never know.
For DeSteno, feeling homesick and alone were also concerns during her first few days. Once she started settling into her schedule and room however, she felt way more at ease, and having a roommate she got along with helped the process of adjusting.
“Me and my roommate were able to share the room well as we decorated our own sides with pictures and other things to make it feel more like home,” she said. “It’s great knowing that if I need an extra person to talk to or get advice from I always have my roommate.”
New Paltz’s new living-learning community, The Rivera House, is a program in Lenape that houses LGBTQA+ members and allies. Freshman Cat Tishelman and her roommates are a part of this program. The community meets once a week to discuss various LGBTQA+ issues and for Tishelman, this makes all the difference.
“Being a part of a living-learning community here has been life changing for me,” she said. “I already feel close enough to [my roommates] because they know so much about me, and I feel like I know a lot about them too.”
Whether you love or hate your roommate, don’t be discouraged. Everyone needs time to adjust during their first year. Get involved in clubs and activities. Attend your hall events to make some new friends in your dorm hall. The key to a good first year is surrounding yourself with supportive people, regardless of whether or not your roommate is one of them.