This might be a harsh reality check for some of you.
First, let’s define it: what is a Situationship? For those who have never really heard this term, you could basically say it is: a romantic type of relationship that is undefined, uncommitted, and not always exclusive (but can be.) To be real though, most people (including myself) would define a Situationship as when one person wants a relationship and the other won’t commit. I’m sure many of us are familiar with this concept, especially if it involves a frat boy.
From my experience, before I realized that this was not a healthy situation to be in, I was constantly on the end of a Situationship where I wanted to take it to the next level, and the guy I wanted to be with just wouldn’t get off Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge and had commitment issues. These guys would continue to hook up with other girls and myself included, and I stuck around just waiting for him to change his mind. A lot of my friends can relate, so if you’re reading this, you probably can, too.
PSA: Situationships are not the move, and you can’t change a guy’s mind – no matter how much sex you give him. Babes, we clearly deserve so much better than this, but we’re at fault here, too. We basically hand over our power, pride, and p*ssy on a platter to these guys and expect them to want to date us. But, ladies, there’s no chase in that for the guy, so he’s bored and continues on to find something challenging and new. I’m now a firm believer in women never making the first move because it’s a basic instinct for men to chase women. In my experience though, the guys our age are so lazy when it comes to the chase. Why, though? Because, generally us women, and yes, I’m 100% guilty of this, we give them our whole selves – body, mind, spirit – right off the bat. It’s hard to do, but we need to be a challenge. Make him work for it. We are the damn prizes, not them. Don’t hate me for any of this. It’s the truth.
Get into Megan Thee Stallion’s mindset and be the Hot Girl with the dude you’re in a Situationship with:
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Stop texting him back as soon as he replies. Leave him on delivered on Snapchat and on seen to his lame DM on Insta (also – a major red flag in guys if his only form of communication he uses with you is Snapchat or Instagram DM. He needs to ask for your phone number or he can GTFO.)
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Don’t make him your priority because you’re in college – make lifelong friends through Greek life, clubs, sports, etc., and focus on your damn academics.
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Stay busy. Go to the gym, go to the library, anything. Don’t think about this loser guy! Occupy yourself so that even if he does Snapchat you, you’re too busy to even think about him and too preoccupied to respond.
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Realize that since he won’t commit, he never will. I said it once and I’ll say it again: he won’t change because of you. Sorry, but he won’t. It’s in your best interest to ignore this guy and move on. Don’t worry, though, he’ll definitely come back in a month or two missing you – they always do.
None of this was meant to hurt your feelings, but it’s the truth. Just focus on yourself, babes. I promise you Jack from Sigma Apple Pie is not your soulmate. Jack from Sigma Apple Pie is hungover on a Wednesday morning from playing di the night before with his brothers and hasn’t showered in three days. I promise you, there is so much better out there.
Also, don’t get me wrong. I love men!!! Maybe not any of the guys I’ve been around, but there are some good ones. I promise babes, there are so many amazing men out there who will treat us hot girls like we deserve to be treated. Don’t settle for Jack.
And for the love of God – please do not do a single thing for a guy you’re in a Situationship with for Valentine’s Day. If he didn’t do it for you, don’t do it for him. Remember: if he wanted to, he would.