The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
It’s Valentine’s Day and we know as soon as we open our socials, it’s going to be couples FLOODING our feed. As someone who’s been heartbroken before, it tends to bring up memories, especially when the reason for your heartbreak, posts someone else. I will say it hurt extremely less this year, so there’s that.
For me, it’s been 2 years and it took about one of those years, to not necessarily forget, but forgive and come to peace with the breakup. That should be more than enough time to “move on”, right? Every person I’ve ever met has had a different timeline for when they were able to move on and get over their past situation… AND THAT IS OKAY!! I wish I could stress it enough. There are no rules for how you handle a heartbreak.
Even still today, there will be days every now and then where I’ll think about past memories with him, but that’s not a bad thing. I don’t think of them as memories of him, rather, memories that he just so happens to be a part of. As much as we try to deny it, there usually tend to be some good memories and I personally don’t think we should put in all this effort to disregard them. Every experience is a learning experience. They are the things that shape us into who we are today and who we are still becoming. Our happiest memories are ones we shouldn’t want to forget because of the genuineness of them.
With that being said, it’s okay to reminisce… just not obsess. Like I said before, we all have different timelines for when we are able to move forward. It’s okay to miss them and it is okay to miss the memories, as long as you don’t let it consume you. When you let it consume you, you’re letting them control your emotions and that’s what can make it harder to make progress. I’m happy for the both of us and the success we are making in our lives. I’ll forever be grateful for the person that was once in my life and the impact they left.
For anyone who is going through, or has gone through, a breakup, your feelings are valid and NORMAL. We are constantly growing and changing. Not everyone is meant to stay in each stage of your life and that’s important to remember. You’re your only assured constant.