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He’s Just Not That Into You: Eight Tips Every Girl Could Use!

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at NCSU chapter.
Any girl would be lying if she said she had never felt a little psychotic waiting around to hear from a guy who really was not that fantastic in the first place. Every girl has gone through the torture of staring at her phone, too distracted by her heartbreak to concentrate on her homework and a little hesitant to go to the gym because she won’t have her phone with her for that one measly hour or so. The “waiting for him to call when you really know he won’t” game is one of the many complexities of the relationship between men and women.

I would love to say that we are all to blame. Sometimes, that blame is fairly split down the middle between genders. But when a girl has that initial gut-wrenching instinct that the guy she just went to dinner with last night might not be calling, she and her friends immediately come up with a list of reasons why he did not call. We torture ourselves, making believe that he is perfect and that he thinks the same of you. We make up excuses for these men, saying that he probably just dropped his phone out of his third story window while he was gazing at the stars, getting ready to call you because you just crossed his mind. But it’s simple, and when it comes to this part of a relationship, ladies, we are to blame -because we go crazy and we act crazy. We make up excuses, any excuses, when really…he’s just not that into you.

To prove my point, here are the general life lessons us ladies can hopefully learn by watching the movie He’s Just Not That Into You. This movie is an intertwinement of couples and close friends who are brutally honest with each other. It will help you weed out the guys who are worth your time and will help you realize – all on your own – that if a guy is not into you, it will be an easy to see. So here are the basics to look out for in a guy:
 

 
1. Jerk alert!
We are taught from a young age that if a guy is mean to you, it means that he likes you. So we are programmed to put faith in these guys. But guys are pretty easy to read for the most part. If he’s acting like a jerk, he’s a jerk.

 
2. Let him come to you!
If you know that your lack of self-control will not allow you to wait for him to call, then you need to force yourself to chill out. If you watch your phone, waiting, but eventually send him a text asking why he has not called yet, here’s an idea: delete his number. Delete it from your call log, message inbox and contacts all together. Don’t worry; it’s temporary! It will force you to not contact him until he comes to you. Even if it takes him eight hours to text or call, trust me, he’ll be wondering what you were doing the past eight hours too!

 
3. Don’t cheat!
Don’t cheat. And DO NOT BECOME the other woman. No matter what. Not only out of respect for the guys’ girlfriend, fiancé, or wife, but also to help your conscience. Because your guilty conscience will get a hold of you. So for her sake, his sake and your sake, do not get involved with an otherwise occupied man. If you see a hot guy at a frat party, but you know his girlfriend is out of town and he’s a charmer, stay away. It’s as simple as that.
 
 
4. Talk, don’t stalk!
Do not stage a casual run-in. Do not walk around campus near the buildings he mentioned some of his classes are in. Because you rarely have a good enough excuse for why you’re there. If you run into him, you run into him. Don’t mess with fate, you will only freak him out.

 
5. Never settle!
There are exceptions to every rule. But when it comes to relationships, the exceptions make up a very, very small percentage of the population. So the odds of every girl who reads this article becoming an exception will be next to impossible. Nobody is simple; everybody has his or her own glitches. But everybody has somebody out there who is his or her exception, and you will know it when it happens. But when it comes down to it, if a guy acts like he does not care about you, he genuinely does not care about you. So move on until you find the guy who treats you like a princess. He’s out there, I promise.

6. Be a little mysterious!
Nowadays, if a guy says he’ll find you on Facebook, just run. Because he’ll friend you on Facebook and you’ll be giddy and excited seeing his friend request. But after that, it’s all downhill. Because the best part about the first few dates is getting to know somebody. But if he has access to your Facebook, you’re an open book! No need for him to ask about your favorite movies, what you’re studying, where you like to go out, etc. It’s all already there! So give him your phone number and just leave the friend request pending. It’ll keep him waiting and make him a little antsy. Right where you want him!

7. Let those cheaters go!
If a guy cheats on you, just get out. Even if he is begging to have you back and even if he seems sincerely apologetic about his mistake. But what it comes down to is that he did it for a reason. Ladies, do not take offense to what I’m saying…but if a guy cheats, he’s looking for something else. Which is an awful realization, but it also means that he’s not your puzzle piece. Plus, if he cheats and you walk away without looking back, he’ll be the one moping. Because walking away without another word gives you a kind of confidence you have not felt before – believe me! It’s powerful because you realize how much more you deserved.

8. Trust your instincts!
The bottom line is, trust your instinct. We as women don’t give our instinct enough credit. When a guy asks for your number at a bar and you get a small twisted feeling in your stomach, trust it. That’s your body telling you he’s not good for you. When your guy says he’s going to be busy at the library all night and won’t have his phone, but then he butt dials you at midnight, that wrench in your heart is your conscience telling you something might be up. Trust yourself and if you feel like he’s not giving you the attention you want, then….he’s just not that into you.

Campus Correspondent and Founder of Her Campus NCSU - kristiedemers@hercampus.com Kristie Demers is a Senior English major at North Carolina State University. When she isn't studying or busy working on campus, Kristie enjoys running, writing, reading, photography, and painting. She volunteered as an athletic trainer for the Cheerleading team freshman year and developed an unwavering devotion for the Wolfpack. This Wisconsin natives passions include traveling, spending time with family and friends, and loving even the little things in life. Although she is down to earth and loves making people smile, Kristie is hard working and welcomes challenges. All that this happy-go-lucky girl dreams for the future is to write for a magazine and live at the beach. In the meantime, her heart lies in the bricks at N.C. State and beats with every chime of the Bell Tower!