It’s 9:10a.m. That long hair is a tangled mess and you’re sporting the first outfit you pulled out of your dresser in the dark. Everyone that walks past you gives you an odd look and you realize that you didn’t attempt to put any make-up on and you’re wearing two different sneakers on your feet.
You’re running late to your first class of the day. When you clumsily enter the room, out of breath and looking like a spitting image of Lady Gaga on her day off, sleepy students turn their attention towards you. This has the potential of a serious meltdown or a good laugh. Sure, this day started off on the wrong foot, and in the wrong shoe, but the fact is that your self-confidence determines how people will see you. Will you put your head down and rush to your seat or smile and suavely shrug it off as you make your way to that seat next to the class hottie?
Confidence, according to your very own – Her Campus NCSU team, has a number of definitions and applications in our lives. You can either walk into that room going about your day, expecting it to continually get worse, or we can apply that strong, sassy swagger and show everyone who you really are: a confident-collegiette™!
The Her Campus NCSU Team weighs in:
What is Confidence?
- “Confidence is sometimes hard to find. It’s something that can be found in everyone, but it’s your choice to believe in it.”
- “Confidence is believing in yourself despite failures.”
- “Confidence is the ability to fall down in the brickyard and laugh at yourself!”
- “Confidence is the belief you have in yourself, your future, and your purpose in life.”
The team reveals that their confidence levels are all over the board, ranging from “a pretty big amount,” to “[I] lack confidence in certain aspects of my life.” We all come from different backgrounds, upbringings, families, schools, and experiences in general. All of these factors contribute to the current level of your self-confidence, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t change it now! Wouldn’t you want to go about your day with that thing that “makes your chest stick out,” and have that “essence of courage” to pick your head up and show the world that beautiful smile despite everything that has the potential to bring you down?
How can having confidence help you? How can not having it hurt you?
- “Confidence can help you in every aspect of life. To ask that cutie on a date, to pass that final exam with flying colors, or to get that dream internship. You have to believe you can do it. If you don’t believe in yourself no one else will.”
- “Having confidence can help you stand by your values, your goals, your passions and desires. It can help you achieve amazing things. Not having confidence can quickly turn your dreams, values, goals and desires into your worst nightmares.”
- “Confidence gives you energy and it’s a visible energy. Whether you walk into a bar or in front of the class, everybody is looking for the same thing in you. Guys might say the first thing they notice is a girl’s butt or her smile, but really, they’re looking for that glow and that upright stance a confident girl will have.”
- “Having confidence is visible to everybody you see and meet. This shows people that you demand respect, which is admired. Not having confidence leads to you not standing up for yourself.”
Having confidence is your ticket to feeling sexy, reaching your goals, meeting new people, standing up for what you believe in, and appreciating the little things despite life’s frequent let downs, instead of having another “Debbie downer” day.
How you can instantly build confidence:
- Prove yourself wrong! “Go out and do something that you’ve always wanted to do, but never had the confidence to do. Start small and once you’ve done it, you’ll prove to yourself you’ve had confidence all along.”
- Go to the gym! “Even if you’re there for 20 minutes, and even if you don’t feel like you need to work out, it makes you feel so good about yourself. You could leave your dorm room, feeling like you have huge love handles, but when you come back, you look in the mirror and you see a 6-pack! If you feel good about your body, you’ll show more confidence!”
- Smile! “Keeping a smile on your face allows you to keep a positive attitude which will reflect confidence.”
- Be positive! It is so easy to point out your flaws instead of your qualities, but focus on your strengths, the things you LOVE about yourself, and accept compliments when they are given! People don’t just make up flattering comments just because.
- Dress hot! Wearing your favorite outfits or even those comfy clothes that can be both casual and sexy will make you feel great about yourself. You feel confident in your own skin and people will see you as the strong beaming spirit that you are!
- Fake it! Some mornings you may wake up and just feel like this isn’t your day and you will try everything you can to change your mind. You will put on that smile and that hot outfit, you will be the first to respond to your professors questions, and you will even doodle little quotes like, “You’re Good Enough, You’re Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like You,” in your notebook, yet something still won’t spark that light in you. Fake it! Pretending to have and feel that confidence is almost the same as genuinely having it because people will treat you with a sort of respect and praise, (not too much, you’re not a godly figure) and it will give you just enough to maybe offer the actual confidence you couldn’t provide yourself.
Imagine for a moment this scenario, close your eyes, (okay, don’t do that, that will make it a little hard to read this) vividly visualize that you are walking through the Brickyard and it is a gorgeous warm day. Students dot the courtyard in groups and sit lazily on the grass watching the crowds pass by. Your shoulders are back and your chest is out, you’re smiling and realize that you have caught the attention of a group of guys sitting on the brick wall to your right. At that moment, you flick your hair seductively and with your next step, you manage to trip over one of those awkwardly skewed bricks. The next thing you know you’re on the ground, pens sprinkled around your body and the half eaten apple from lunch rolls directly towards that group of guys. What do you do? This is your time to shine. Utilize that confident-collegiette™ swagger, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and fetch your apple from those hotties while asking them if they had planned the whole thing out just for a chance to talk to you. Too confident? Nah, there is no such thing! Just don’t get cocky!
One of my most trusted allies in life once quoted Marianne Williamson to make me see that I have more gusto, more talent and more significance in life than I gave myself credit for…”Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”