As a French exchange student at NC State University, I have heard almost every stereotype about French people, especially the famous one that we are rude. After a year and a half observing those stereotypes and the other French people present in Raleigh, I have come up with the answer to whether or not the idea that we are all rude is true or not: as some of the other French I have met were, in fact, rude, I believe that some “rude ways to be” that Americans believe we do are just showing a culture gap between America and France.
First, the main thing that I found out by being French in America is that we do not greet people the same way. Americans are more smiling in the street and say “how are you” without waiting for an answer just to be nice. On the other hand, a French person will not say “how are you” to you all the time; if they do, they are waiting for a real answer that will lead to a conversation. So, as Americans may assume that the French way of not saying “How are you” to every person they meet is rude, French people find the fact that no answer is rude. This shows a first culture gap, which does not mean that one culture is more rude than the other.
Another example would be tipping at a restaurant. I have heard a lot of people saying that French people are rude for not tipping, or not tipping enough, at a restaurant. The thing is that it is not rudeness from us; it is just not something we do back in the country. Because of the fact that we are not used to tipping and do not know how much a good tip is. This example also shows an act taken as rude by Americans when it just shows a gap in cultural understanding, which leads to misunderstanding.
While many stereotypes about French people come from cultural misunderstandings, I have also noticed some behaviors in the French community that Americans might fairly consider rude. On the other hand, there are also stereotypes about the French that I actually see Americans doing more often.
As a student, in order to go to class, I have been taking the bus every morning and every night each day. I have noticed two things that are, in fact, rude and are mostly coming from the French community. First would be that most French people I have seen on the bus actually do not say either “hello” while getting on the bus, nor “thank you” to the driver while getting off. This is, to me, a big lack of respect, as I have also taken the bus in France, which is not something that is usually done back in the country. Furthermore, French people push on the bus, which I know bothered a lot of my American friends. This act also happens back in the country as buses are crowded and people want to squish to find a spot, but this is seen as rude.
On the other hand, one big thing I have heard about French people (actually in class about the difference between French and American culture) is that Americans actually do way more than we do, which is being late. I am currently in a mixed class between different cultures. Each day, the people who are late are mostly Americans. I have friends who are Americans, and they are at least 5 minutes late to every meeting we have. Which, to me, is wrong to be given to the French people by Americans, as I see the perfect opposite in my daily life. But also, as for every single other example I gave before, it depends on the person.
Next time you hear a bad cliché about another culture, remember that what looks like rudeness might just be a cultural difference. Sometimes we are not rude at all; we just grew up doing things differently.