If you’re like me and you’re flying solo this Valentine’s Day, you most likely have been on the other end of a FaceTime call this past week, listening to a friend’s romantic plans with their significant other for the upcoming ‘weekend of love’. I’ve been in this situation a few times already this week.
You’ve probably been asked by your friends or your family:
“Don’t you get lonely without a boyfriend?”
Or here’s my personal favorite:
“Why wouldn’t a boy want to take a pretty girl like you out? Have you tried out any of those dating apps?”
It’s almost like the people around you feel sorry for you and are more upset about you not being in a relationship than you are. It’s crazy, right? It really blows their mind when you tell them you aren’t even looking for a relationship!
Over the years, we’ve been taught that we need a significant other in our lives. We need to depend on someone for our happiness. We need someone to buy us food and take us out on dates. We’ve been conditioned to always think we need to be looking for love.
However, that’s not the case. We may want those things, but we definitely don’t need them. One thing we all need to realize is being single in college is 100% okay and romantic love isn’t the only type of love out there.
Oh by the way, if you’re wondering about my friend’s plans up there, he’s cooking her a steak dinner, they’re going on an ice cream picnic after, and then finishing the night off with a homemade movie theater in the living room watching “Love Actually.” Sounds like a dream, I know.
Don’t get me wrong, having a relationship with that one person with who you share so many memories and vulnerable moments is an experience like no other. Also, life can get lonely at times, especially during a worldwide pandemic. But, it’s time to realize that flying solo is normal and you shouldn’t dread the thought of Valentine’s Day approaching. Start looking at it as a day to recognize and appreciate all of the love around you and a day to celebrate your independence.
Think of the individuals in your life who support you. Or even the hobbies and passions that make you who you are. And let’s not forget the most important type of love out there. Yep, that’s right. I’m talking about self-love. Sometimes the hardest relationship to maintain, but it’s important and a necessity in life if we ever want to start a relationship with someone else down the road.
Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to start that relationship with yourself and really find out what you love (and what you might not love) about yourself. Being single is the perfect opportunity to be vulnerable with yourself and learn day by day to appreciate who you are, flaws and all.
So, to all my single ladies out there, arrange a “Galentine’s Zoom Cooking Night” with your girls, safely gather in the park for a dessert picnic with a few friends, or order yourself some takeout and watch your favorite movie with your cat on the couch. Just because you don’t have a lover to cook you a steak dinner or take you on a picnic, doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy Valentine’s Day with others who fulfill your life with just as much love.
Do whatever makes YOU happy this Valentine’s Day. Always remember, flying solo takes you to all of the same destinations as being in a romantic relationship with someone – you just might see some different views along the way.