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Living Life On Your Own Terms – Stop Party Shaming

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Nanyang Tech chapter.

You’ve just ended a long, hectic week and the weekend is finally here. You find yourself in the middle of the dance floor with a glass of alcohol to take the edge off. Under the hypnotising lights, Queen Riri is blasting through the speakers: “Please don’t stop the music!” 


This is how I like to spend my Friday nights from time to time, especially when it has been a trying week. It can sound a little cliche, but partying truly helps me to forget the stress, albeit temporarily. Dancing to impeccable music, screaming to relatable lyrics, vibing with my friends… sounds like a liberating night to me. 

But what really gets on my nerves is when people start to shame you for how you choose to enjoy your downtime. “How do you do this without getting tired? I guess I’ve outgrown the party scene.” “Are you going through something? You should really spend some time with yourself instead of wasting your nights like this.” 


Of course I don’t find the need to explain my choices, but it can get really annoying when people assume that engaging in ‘toxic behaviour’ is your ‘coping mechanism’. Can’t a girl just genuinely want to have a good time, even if it’s in the club? 

I’m a strong believer of work hard, play hard. I’ve slogged away during the weekdays, and I’ve earned my right to enjoy my time however I want to on the weekend. Sometimes it’s just a fun way of spending time with your friends, though it’s not like we do this every week. My body and wallet wouldn’t be able to handle the consequences! 

Nonetheless, it’s important that everything should be done in moderation. Excessive partying without a care in the world would just lead to regrettable actions, so I always make sure that I’m able to handle the consequences of my actions. 

I’ll take the extra step to ensure that my work isn’t plunging, and I’m not sacrificing quality time with my family and friends just to ‘have an escape’. Most importantly, I don’t spiral out of control till I black out. I mean, can you really say you’ve had a good time if you don’t remember it? 

And if being a homebody is your way of unwinding, then don’t let those ‘you’re so lame’ comments get to you. Who’s to say that you have to ‘touch some grass’ to have a meaningful rest? 

If you’re sure that you wouldn’t regret your actions, no one can stop you u from doing what you want to do? We’re only young once; don’t waste the time on overthinking other people’s opinion of you! You don’t want to be 70 and regretting that you haven’t lived life to the fullest. 

I used to feel really guilty when people gave me ‘that’ look after I told them I was out partying on Friday night. Now, I’m trying to liberate myself from other people’s perceptions and just do whatever I want to do. You only live once!

Zhi Yi Ong

Nanyang Tech '24

Loves to sleep so much that she spends more time being asleep than awake. When she is actually awake, she enjoys watching films and writing about culture.