College doesn’t necessarily ruin high school relationships, but it does test them. Going from seeing someone everyday in high school to seeing them every few weeks in college is never an easy adjustment. There are a few, simple key elements to making a relationship work in college. If you and your boyfriend or girlfriend are both willing to make the commitment and put in all the effort to maintaining a strong relationship, then you’re already part of the way there!
Trust
I truly believe that you can only love someone if you trust them. Trust isn’t something you build overnight. It takes some time to become completely confident in someone. You should never rely on someone else for your happiness, but you should be able to depend on your significant other to be there for you when you need them.
In any situation, you should always feel safe and protected. You should never let anyone control and monitor your life. If you have someone telling you what to do all of the time, they clearly don’t trust you to make your own decisions. You should be able to trust each other no matter where they are or whom they are with. If you have a tight, strong bond you should be able to trust each other with just about anything.
Respect
Everyone deserves respect. You must give respect in order to receive it. You must value each other’s wishes and independence. Giving respect means you are allowing each other to have the ability to be yourselves, giving one another the freedom to be entitled to your own opinions, and allowing each other to being able to make your own decisions while finding a happy medium together. Everyone knows the saying, “actions speak louder than words”. Show respect not only with your words, but, more importantly, with your actions.
Communication
Communication is key! Although you think you know someone really well, you should never assume what someone is thinking or how they are feeling. Believe it or not, you cannot read people’s minds. Both people in a relationship should give each other a chance to speak, while the other listens and tries to understand what they are saying. Be open and honest about how you feel, always tell the truth. You don’t need to notify each other about every little detail in your life, but just make sure you are both on the same page. The more you communicate in a relationship, the closer you become to one another and your bond only grows stronger.
Relationships are a two-way street. If you have trust, respect and healthy communication between each other, it won’t be difficult to maintain a relationship in college. I have been so lucky these last four years to be in a relationship with someone who I can trust, has respect for me, and is easy to talk with about anything. He constantly shows me endless love, kindness and appreciation. Although I wish I could see him everyday, the wait to see him each time is always worth it.