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An Open Letter to the Ex Who Said I Wasn’t Good Enough

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Montclair chapter.

I don’t know – maybe I wasn’t good enough for you. We were so different, our ways of living and everything. I wasn’t used to the things that you did, and you probably weren’t used to mine. So it was probably inevitable that we fought so often. I acknowledge that we were different to the point where we couldn’t stand it but that, by no means, gives you the right to tell me that I’m not good enough.

I was so young then, naive even. I was just excited to be in a relationship, I guess. It was probably why I was such a pushover and allowed you to treat me the way that you did. I didn’t know any better. I didn’t know how a man was supposed to treat me and it’s so clear that you already knew that about me. Constantly comparing me to your friend’s girls, asking me for things that you knew I wouldn’t and couldn’t give, and telling me that you were too good for me to be with.​

And you know, I believed that about myself for a while, even after I left you. Was I really not good enough? Did I really have a problem? No. It took a long time but I realized, there’s nothing wrong with me. I am good enough just the way I am, and that’s why I left your sorry ass. You were the one with the problem, speaking to me, and probably other girls in that way. So I’ve come to the conclusion. I don’t need you, or any guy that speaks to me that way. Why? Because I am good enough. And you know what? I really hope that you can wake up and start treating women the way that they should be treated.


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Danielle has held various positions at Her Campus Montclair. Starting as a Contributing Writer during her sophomore year at MSU in 2015, she later became President & Editor-in-Chief during her senior year in 2017. She completed her B.A. in Communication & Media Arts with a minor in Leadership Development at Montclair State University in January 2018. Besides writing, she's a lover of cozy cafés, good lyrics, inspiring speeches, mountainous retreats, and sunsets on the skyline. She enjoys capturing the moment and has a passion for travel and discovery. You can often find her exploring NYC or venturing to one of her favorite East Coast spots.