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Life > Experiences

Single and Not Looking to Mingle

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Monmouth chapter.

 As a professional sucker for all romance novels that are filled with extreme clichés and ridiculous false expectations, it is very easy to assume and then say that I’d love to have a boyfriend. But really, it’s mostly because all of my preferred novels make it out to be oh-so-easy to get one. Then once you do have one, it seems that life becomes spectacular, simple and things fall into place. You apparently feel all of these… “things”. Like constant butterflies from their smile, sparks when they touch you in the slightest way and you gain their everlasting promise to be there. Though the second that my eyes lift up from pages my nose is deeply buried into, it’s almost like reality is there to slap me in the face and scream, “SIKE!” Yeah, way too good to be true.

If it seems like I’m knocking romance novels, I’m really not trying to. As an aspiring author myself, that is a genre I’d love to tackle (and have already attempted on numerous occasions…). Like mentioned before, I’m a total romance hoarder. I can easily go through a really good romance novel in two to three hours, depending on the length of it and the time that I have to do so. When I was on my winter break, I felt like I had all the time in the world. The entirety of my break was another day, another novel. And if you know me then you know I was literally living my best life.

As much as it pains me to say, romance novels are just so dangerous. It is so easy to get wrapped up in them and compare real life relationships to those within the novels. FYI, that’s a big no-no that will only lead you to trouble and heartbreak that you’ve inflicted on yourself. Been there, done that, do not need to ever return; take my word for it. These novels are for entertainment purposes only and sometimes, it’s incredibly difficult to remind yourself that if you’re as committed to them as I am. Reading them as much as I do and constantly seeing couples all over the place has me thinking; is life all about finding your person? Is it all about finding your missing piece to help you solve the rest of the puzzles you’ll face in life?

So here’s my proposition for 2019 to all of my fellow single pals, find other things in life that complete you before looking for a person. Before investing yourself in another person, invest in yourself. Find more passions, see where your motivation lies and seek new experiences to help build you more into who you are. Let’s be serious about these things, kids; relationships require work. They aren’t like classic romance novels or anything of the sort; what you put in is usually what you get out. Commit to yourself before committing to someone else. Leave this year to be all about you and finding yourself, not about finding your picture-perfect person.

 

Samantha Losurdo is a senior at Monmouth University where she is studying Communication concentrated in Journalism and minoring in creative writing. She's an aspiring novelist and loves to write articles focused with positive attitudes for the readers. As optimistic as they come, her main goal with her writing is to always have the reader be inspired to view life in a different perspective. There isn't a day that goes by where she hasn't written something and read at least five chapters of the latest novel in her collection. You can find her on Instagram @samilosurdo47.