Congratulations! You’ve taken a baby step by choosing to read this – a baby step in learning how to become your true self. Your true, confident self. As someone who struggled for years with confidence, the only true advice I can give is that this all comes from within. The decision to love yourself is just that: a decision. You are more than able to do this, and I am going to try to help you with my tips.
1. Make a Mantra
The term “mantra” comes from Hinduism and is defined as the creation of a word or phrase that is repeated for concentration. This may feel silly at first – after all, making up a random saying and saying that to yourself every day may feel out of place – but continuity is key. It’s difficult to say what mantra would be right for you because it is completely customizable. It can be anything from an inspirational quote to something as simple as “You are beautiful; you are going to have a great day.”
2. Compliment Yourself
For those of us who have low-self-esteem, this can be the most difficult mountain to climb. It seems as though putting yourself down is much easier than lifting yourself up. It can be difficult to focus on what is right with yourself when all you see are things wrong. To start, focus on the most simple aspects of yourself. Try to compliment yourself daily – the great thing about compliments is that they are free and never in low supply! Anything from “I’m really proud of myself for helping my friend” to “I love the way my shirt looks on me today.”
3. Learn to Accept Compliments
Just as you’ve finished climbing that “Compliment Yourself” mountain, another one awaits. Learning to accept the compliments from others can also be a difficult task. A lot of people do not want to be seen as “conceited”, so often they will respond to compliments with self- deprecating comments. The fact of the matter is, this helps no one. What is so bad about accepting a compliment? I promise you, it will not hurt you. Even if deep in your soul you do not believe a compliment like “You’re pretty” or “You’re so sweet!” the best thing you can say is “Thank you.” You may have to force it out initially, but you’ll be able to start understanding why people are saying these nice words. Self-deprecation has been clouding your sight, but don’t let it continue.
4. Bad Days Are Normal
Eventually, you’ll start having some great days. You will wake up and smile; you will walk this earth and love yourself. But remember, there will also be those days where you feel like all the progress you’ve made was all for naught. Quite the contrary, just because you wake up in a bad mood and are starting to feel low about yourself does not negate all of the work you have put in on this journey to self-love. Bad times are just times that are bad- and you have so many more beautiful days ahead of you. So, let yourself have those bad days, just remember to wake up the next day and have a great one.
5. Accept That It Will Be a Long Journey
Nobody has told you that this is going to be easy; the truth is, it’s going to be a tough journey. All of these tips will not work overnight. You have to put the work in yourself to better your life and your self-image. The hard truth is that nothing is life is going to make you better: not wearing less make up, not losing that extra pound, or whatever is it that you feel is separating you from happiness. Happiness comes completely from within. The good news is: you’re more than capable of doing this; the great news is: when you finally do get those little jolts of self- love, you’re going to wonder what took you so long.