If you and a close friend end up going to the same college, I guarantee you will hear the words, “Don’t room with a best friend!” It is one of the golden rules of university life, but should you listen to it?
Spoiler alert: I didn’t listen, but my situation may be a bit different than others. I transferred to MNSU, Mankato for my sophomore year, and my best friend just happened to be planning on transferring, too. She and I went to separate colleges for our freshman year, so we experienced most of the firsts of college away from one another. I suggested she take a look at Minnesota State.
When we were in high school, we used to joke that we’d go to college and room with each other. We didn’t expect that it would ever actually happen.
We sat down with each other and discussed whether or not we should room together. We were both a little nervous about the idea, but we also thought it could be really fun. Here’s a tip: if you are thinking about rooming with a friend, sit down and talk to them about your sleeping habits, your lifestyle, your need for space, etc. It’s super important to have an idea of how your friend likes to live.
Both of our parents warned us that we might end up hating each other. We’ve all heard those horror stories of roommates starting as friends and ending as enemies. That was the last thing either of us wanted.
So, here’s the thing; if you’ve been best friends with this person for a long time, you should have an innate idea of how you two will do living together. My roommate and I have been friends since seventh grade, and we survived our own share of arguments and being on other sides of the country for a year. I knew her, she knew me. Yes, we were nervous when we finally decided to room together, but we also knew that if we had issues, we would talk them out.
There are some friends I know I couldn’t live with, and that’s okay! It doesn’t make them any less of your friend. One of my closest companions has been in my life since we were four years old and I could never room with her; we would drive each other absolutely crazy if we were in a confined space for a whole school year.
So, know yourself and know your friend. Listen to the advice of those around you. We both took into consideration what our parents and our other friends said, who urged us against it. We took their arguments and discussed them with one another so we could see if they applied to our situation or not. For us, they didn’t.
We are quickly approaching the end of the first semester of my sophomore year, so I can tell you with confidence how my roommate and I are doing. The answer? Really well! Our friendship has only grown stronger in these first few months of school. Whenever we have bad days, we text one another and the other will immediately provide support. We cheer for each other on our successes and we feel for one another’s failures. Sometimes we annoy each other when we want attention, but we are either hugging or laughing hysterically about a joke the next moment.
I’ll be the first to say that not everyone can room with their best friend. I just got pretty lucky. With our year apart, we faced the issues all freshman do and grew as people and matured enough to know that we could handle living together.
The final decision, of course, is up to you. Know yourself and know your friend, know your boundaries, your space, how you solve conflicts, and make the best decision you can!