Looking Ahead When Nothing's as You Thought It Would Be

As I begin my last year of college, accepting reality has not been an easy pill for me to swallow. My college experience was something I wouldn't have traded for the world or ever let go of on my own and it’s taken me months to get over the initial disappointment of having to leave campus. After settling in at home and participating in an internship that allowed me to continue working towards my goals and prepare for an entirely online start to Senior year, I was thankfully able to achieve some stability. With so much time to think about where to go from here, I’m mapping out a new plan for what I want to achieve that’s more focused on the bigger picture. I’ve decided that for now all I can do is focus on giving school my best efforts, including keeping up with clubs and visiting my roommates when I can. I’m taking classes that particularly interest me and give me the chance to be immersed in what I know best. A virtual senior year could never compare to what it was like going to a small school in the big city, but what I can do for myself is make it the best it can be. I never realized how much I’d miss school when I no longer attend which is all the more reason to remember to appreciate where I am right now. And I haven’t stopped planning for all the good things still to come either. With only two semesters left, I’m looking forward to being able to choose what comes next. I know when I look back on this, I’m going to be proud of myself for the way I kept going when it felt like it was all over for me and that no matter what, I owe it to myself to become everything I ever dreamed of being. It’ll always be New York or nowhere and I’m going to be back there on my own terms, I’m sure of it.