As Women’s History Month approaches, women around the globe come together to celebrate the triumphs and hard work of women, past and present, who have brought us to where we are now. This month is a time of community, femininity, and pride for who we are. However, through all the celebration and recognition, you have to ask yourself, what does it even mean to be a woman, especially in todays ever changing world? As a freshman in college, this question has been lingering in my head since the moment I joined Her Campus. I love being part of a women-based group who stop at nothing to support one another. However, I have never been a part of a group for women like this. So it got me to raise the question. Now, since this is such a loaded question, I decided that I couldn’t answer it alone. So, with the help of my community on Merrimack College’s campus, I think I may have found the answer.Â
Through my study, I have found that being a woman is something that is not only biological; 60% of participants stated that they feel like being a woman in today’s age is something that is personal, social, and cultural. Now, along with it being personal, social, and cultural, most people also associate being a woman with femininity. Femininity used to be this scary concept to me growing up. As a tomboy, it wasn’t something I resonated with. However, femininity is not about liking pink or dresses; femininity is feeling empowered, strong, gentle, and even adaptable. You don’t have to dress or look feminine to feel feminine. Feeling feminine comes from the inside. It comes from knowing who you are, and that caan empower you to do more than you could ever imagine.Â
Now, being a woman has its pros and cons, and not just the obvious ones like getting a period. Some people like the more stereotypical things about being a woman, like “the girly products and aesthetics,” while others like the “automatic sense of community amongst other women.” These types of things are what get us excited about being women. We get to enjoy little luxuries and communities just because of who we are. Even though there is so much to love about being a woman, sometimes, especially today, being a woman feels complicated. Sometimes, you never really know what to feel because “somebody will judge you no matter what you do.” Othertimes, you never know what standards you are being held to, which leads to a misunderstanding of who each of us is, just because of our gender. For instance, when the “sexualization of clothing choices” or the idea that women are “weak.” One of my participants summed it up really well, she said that it’s, “you’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you don’t.”
As for the history of womanhood, that’s a long and treacherous path, but it must be understood in order to answer the question. The way we define womanhood didn’t just change when we got the right to vote around 1920; it changed generationally. History is spread through the way we talk about it. This shift in talking about what women are capable of has led us from just being “the partner of a man” to becoming “powerful individuals” who can make choices that best fit our interests. The definition is still constantly changing in the 21st century. With that change comes new expectations that are placed on women based on our current state in the world. Sometimes, as a woman, you feel like you “can not speak up for yourself,” have to “always be pretty and presentable,” or even “be smart but not smarter than men.” As one participant stated, “We have to be able to do everything and make it look like it costs nothing.” Even the way we fight for change, feminism, is an ever changing defenition based on our time period. One participant stated that she thought she “had to be strong/masculine to be feminist, but feminism is about the right to choose,” and I think that perfectly summarizes how feminism feels in the modern day.Â
As much as the definition of being a woman has changed over history, it has also changed for girls in my community when coming to college. We all know that college is a drastic change from what we were all used to in high school. It has its academic challenges for sure. But I think one of the biggest changes that comes from college is the way we socialize, and with that, the new perspective that we gain. One person describes this change as becoming “more independent and aware of the societal expectations for women” and also seeing “the connection other women have with each other… how being girls ties us together even if we’re strangers.” Another reason for this change in perspective comes from the amount of resources you gain access to once you step on campus. “Her Campus and Women In Business have made me feel like I can do hard things, and I am just as important as my male counterparts.” These types of perspective shifts allow us to not only begin to see our community from a 3rd party perspective, but also begin to ponder what it means to be a woman as a whole.Â
So with all of this information, what does being a woman actually mean? As I have gathered responses and thought long and hard over the past year, I think I can get a little closer to what the definition of it is from today’s perspective. Being a woman is a lot, it is “constantly trying to prove yourself” so you can gain the same recognition that a man would receive, it’s “fighting for equality and equity with our sisters,” yet it’s also having compassion and awareness, it means “knowing who you are and being completely unapologetic about it.” However, if I had to summerize all my responses and thoughts into one simple sentence, it would be this: being a woman in the 21st century means knowing how important you are and sharing that to the world through means of compassion, grace, and power that emanates through every womans soul.
Post Note: First off, thank you so much for reading and interacting with my work. This is an idea I have had in my head for a while now, and it means the world that I get to share it to a community. I want to get a special shout out to the people that took my survey. Your participation in my article is what makes this piece so great, so thank you. If you are interested in providing your own response for me to see, fill out this google form!Â
Side note, if you want to up your music taste with songs that scream “what it means to be a woman,” listen to these songs that some of my participants shared with me:Â
The Man by Taylor Swift
Doomsday by Lizzy McAlpine
What Was I Made For by Billie EilishÂ
Perfect Celebrity by Lady Gaga
I’ve Seen It by Olivia Dean