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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at MDC chapter.

 

   Why is life worth it? What is the meaning of living? What is the meaning of each person’s life? Why do we give it meaning and what gives it meaning? According to whom? Why are we alive and what do we do here? What is it to be alive? What is life?  Humanity asks itself these questions from archaic times. Since before any of us could look backwards. Moreover, there is no need to generalize. With looking within ourselves, if we are objective, we all asked ourselves some of these questions (if not all). Unanswered questions make human beings uncomfortable. We get angry with them and with ourself for not understanding them and not having an answer (or for whatever the reason). We continue to live life. Being selective of that to which we present attention. What we believe deserves our attention. This is how life goes. It’s the same for everyone. Nobody has privileges. It seems that the more we ignore or evade a question, the more afraid we become. We are more intrigued, tormented, worried and disturbed. I think that each question may or may not have an origin. But the cause of concern always has a root. We are worried about something. And that something, like when it comes to suicide, is life itself.

Yes, I said Suicide. Without any fear or taboos. I’m not afraid. Being afraid of the name only increases the fear of the thing itself. I do not want to be afraid of suicide. Nor do I want to ignore it. I want to have respect. I want us to have that kind of relationship. A healthy relationship in which I never underestimate him and he never mocked me. That’s why I do what I do with everything that scares me; I investigate, I inform myself. I try to meet him and he knows me. I do not judge him and I listen to what he has to say. So that we are not friends, but companions. What a companion that reminds me every day why I have to live.    Many people, because they lived terrible things (or for whatever reason), think about taking their own lives. Or, without going any further, they take their lives. To these people (in addition to telling them that they are not alone and that everything can improve) I want to tell you that, sometimes, it’s okay not to be well. It’s okay to feel bad, lost, confused, not knowing where to go or feel the worst person and believe that everyone is a disaster. It is okay to blame everyone and everyone (or ourselves) from time to time. It’s okay not to know everything. Not having the answers Understanding nothing. Do not have desire or will It’s okay to send everything to the trash and not know how or not to start. It is okay to feel misunderstood, alone, underestimated, mistreated, weak, trapped. It is good to feel sorry and underestimated from time to time. It’s okay not to be perfect and commit errorer. It is good to be a human being. And I want to tell you (besides that you have other options and that all is not lost and that there may be another way of having things) that you are not a mistake. I want to tell you that you are not selfish and that you are not a crappy person. I want to tell you that I know that probably all this is the same and do not believe me or you can not believe me or think what I am saying. That, despite all the list of sayings and positive things, you’re going to be wrong. Because, perhaps, nothing I tell you can make you feel better. But I just want to tell you something that maybe they never told you. It is not your imagination. I think. I believe in what happens to you. I give importance to your pain. They have to find something or someone to make them feel that they are. Someone who believes them and does not underestimate them and can help them. Because (believe me what I tell you) deep down, there was a moment in which you wanted to live. In which you had hope and that is still there. That was always and always will be. Finally, I want to tell you that your life has no value for what you do with it. It has no value because what you have done or what you have gone through. It has no value because others tell you or because you say it. It does not even have value from the biological point of view for reproduction or religious. Neither because of itself or because of a simple life drive. It has no value because it belongs to you or belongs to someone else. Or because it depends on someone else or someone else’s life depends on yours.

It does not depend on the meaning you give to this or that others give to your life. Do you know what the value of your life depends on? You. It’s your choice. And, believe me, human beings do not think we have many. We have not yet been able to determine if this is the case. But, as long as we can choose, it seems to me that the simple fact of being able to choose on our own existence is a huge gift that was granted to us. Of course, we can not see it like that. We may want to return it and we are in all our rights. You are not selfish. You are not brave or cowardly to take your life and “return the gift.” It is not a waste because you give value to things. Returning the gift is a waste of time. You can believe that you are a waste of time and think that you are not missing anything or to think that the said gift does not belong to you. You’re right, life does not belong to you. There is no point in speaking to you about valuing the gift or the wonder of the universe or that your simple existence is wonderful and that your life has value. It does not make sense to tell you that each second your heart beats and that, wherever you look at, it’s a miracle. It does not make sense to tell you many things. But perhaps if it makes sense to tell you that for many reasons you find to end your life, there is always more for what is continuing. And the main reason, you are. I want to tell you that it is not your fault and it is logical (for whatever reason) that you think all this. I know you know it’s not normal to feel that way. And that’s why it scares you and you want it to end. I know you think they have no solution. I know you think you’ve heard everything and nobody can say anything to you. And that there is no other alternative or nothing else to do. I know you think you’re the problem. I can only give you one piece of advice and that is that life is like spring. It is capricious, jealous, complicated. It has beautiful days and rare days, ugly days as well and it does not let people get away from it easily. I believe that it is forbidden to commit suicide in the spring and that if you leave, you will miss the time when the flowers bloom in the spring.

Mi biggest gole in life is to be able to heal what you cant see. To be able to see people even when they fell invisible.
A free spirit who was born and raised in sunny Miami, Fl, Valerie currently studies at Miami-Dade College and is working toward a degree in journalism in hopes of making a difference in the world by unraveling her inner activist through her writing and actions. Everyday making progress little by little.