As we get older, it becomes harder to find guys we actually want to be with. Perhaps, it is because they lack many of the basic qualities us girls want in a man. After meeting a multitude of men who did not live up to my expectations, I made a list of all the characteristics I want in someone and I hope they help you too.
Good Communication Skills – A man who can listen and communicate to me is definitely important. Does this mean I want a guy to talk to me every second of every day? No, not at all. It just means that I want him to be able to listen to what I am saying, and I want him to be able to communicate how he feels or what he’s up to. For instance, if he has a busy day ahead of him and knows that he can’t talk much during the day, just simply let me know you’ll talk to me later instead of making me feel like you don’t care. This is definitely something I find all of my friends and I complaining about when we start talking to someone new.
Responsibility – Finding someone with responsibility is very important to me. A guy who is responsible shows me that he is someone who follows through with his commitments and does what he says he is going to do. It means he is someone I can depend on. It means he is someone who takes responsibility for his actions instead of pushing them onto someone else and making it their fault. Having a responsible person makes me feel like he knows what he is doing with his life, and that he could be a person that can commit in the long run.
Honesty – I cannot begin to explain how important honesty is to me and is to every girl out there. I want somebody who will not lie to me no matter what the situation is. If I ask you something, I want you to be honest with me no matter how hard it may hurt. If I’m with someone, I need to know that I am important to him, that I can trust him. I want someone who can share his life with me. If someone can’t be honest with me, then why do I want to be with them?
Understanding – Finding an understanding guy is major. If I have someone that I know is understanding of me and my feelings, then I won’t feel the need to constantly have to explain myself. I want the person I’m with to know every part of who I am. Of course, in relationships, many girls feel the need to receive validation and confirmation that we are worth it. But having a guy that understands me lets me know that he loves or likes me for me.
Caring – I need to know that I matter to someone when I’m in a relationship with them. Finding a caring person lets me know that he will be there for me when I need it the most. It lets me know that this person is willing to take time out of his life to make me feel better. If I’m with a caring guy, I will definitely be caring toward him when he needs it. It’s a win-win for both people involved.
Confidence – A man that’s confident in his own skin is definitely attractive. Like I said, confident, not cocky. I’m not interested in someone who cares more about himself and his looks than me. No thank you. But, having a guy who is confident, definitely makes me feel more confident with who I am, and it makes me feel secure to be with him.
Compassion – Let’s be honest. We all love a man who is compassionate. Someone who is kind, who people look up to and appreciate. We want someone who is good. Most guys I know think that showing a more compassionate side is weak. But to us girls, and especially me, compassion and kindness is one of the most attractive personality traits a guy can have. It shows me that he’s nice, that he cares about people and the things around him. It lets me know that he isn’t some jerk who’s just looking to get what he wants and then act like nothing happened.
Sense of Humor – I need someone who can make me laugh. Making people laugh is one of my favorite things to do. If he doesn’t make me laugh, then I don’t think I can be with him. If a guy can make me laugh, especially in difficult situations, then he’s definitely a keeper in my book. I guess this may be because humor is my coping mechanism for uncomfortable situations. I tend to laugh a lot because I don’t know what else I can do. But I definitely need someone who can laugh with me whenever and wherever.
Loyalty – If I’m with a guy, I want to be the only one he has eyes for. I want to feel special. I want to feel like I’m the only girl in the world. I want someone who sees me and only me. Yeah, I know I’m not be the most beautiful girl out there, I’m not delusional. But if I’m with someone, I want to be the most beautiful girl to him and that’s how most girls are too. I want him to feel like I am the best person for him. Many guys might read that and be like, “Wow, she’s needy.” Um, no. If I’m with you, then I better be the only person you’re with. It’s really not that hard. If a guy can’t be loyal to a girl, then he doesn’t deserve to be in any type of relationship, especially with me. Plain and simple. If a guy is loyal to me, I am loyal to him.