“God knows we’re worth it”
If you’ve ever heard or listened to the lyrics of Jason Mraz’s song I Won’t Give Up intently, you’ll realize how raw the emotions are and how it perfectly simplifies our often cryptic feelings when the skies get rough.
I recently hit a bump with someone I care about because he wasn’t honest with me.
“Breaking trust is like crumpling a piece of paper and trying to straighten it back out again.”
At the same time only time will tell how I heal and if I can trust him again, but in the meantime my heart hurts and I can’t stop questioning to myself “so what now?”
We both need some space to do some navigating but I question our ability to patiently wait to see what we find because of how young and stupid we are.
Basically we got a lot to learn.
I know I need to choose my battles wisely, but it’s hard when you question whether it’s even worth it pick up the sword. I also wonder if my failed relationships in the past hold weight over my ability to recover from the resentment, embarrassment, and sadness.
I don’t want to be someone who walks away so easily, but keeping two feet on the ground instead of running to forget is excruciating. I feel resented, disrespected, and most of all misunderstood. I don’t think we communicated well and I have to admit that I am at fault for not considering his feelings/thoughts/wants/or whatever is going through his mind.
However, in the end you’re still my friend and I do want to trust you again so I’m going to say I’m sorry. Let’s hope this isn’t a mistake that will come back to slap me across the face because by then I probably won’t be young and stupid anymore, just stupid.