With Valentines day right around the corner, it is officially the season of love. When you think about dating and finding your soul mate, marriage eventually comes to mind; or does it?
With the plethora of television shows that feature wedding topics like, “Four Weddings”, “Say Yes to the Dress” and “Bridezillas” one would think that America is wedding obsessed. Millions of viewers tuned in to see “Kim Kardashian’s Fairytale Wedding” on E, only to have the same network air a show about her divorce 72 days later.
Love is defined as a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person; a feeling of warm personal attachment. Marriage is defined as an institution which two people establish their decision to live as husband and wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by the law and the church.
Are marriage and love still connected? In 2012, factors like divorce rates, prenuptial agreements and online dating in college have blurred the way college students think about love and marriage.
According to a report by The Huffington Post, about 40 percent of people overall thought marriage is obsolete. Sophomore sociology major Jamal Francis disagrees. “Personally I think it is important to stand behind marriage,” Francis said. “There are some downsides, but you shouldn’t let that stop you from getting married; not all marriages are the same.”
Francis is also not afraid to sign or request a prenuptial agreement. He said, “It’s preparing for the worst which is not a bad thing to do.”
Francis believes in soul mates and thinks that there is someone out there for everyone and when you find them, it’s love. On the other hand he does not agree with online dating site that are targeted to college students. Francis said, “If you’re still in college you shouldn’t need a dating site. You should be interacting with people.”
According to “Marie Claire’s 11 Signs You’ll Get Married Someday”, if you’re a college graduate, you’re nine to 14 percent more likely to get married than someone who never finished high school. But not all college students think marriage is necessary.
Senior African-American studies major Jamor Gaffney thinks that marriage is more for political reasons than it is about love. “I’m sure it means something to some people, but I’m not sure I’m one of those people,” Gaffney said.
She thinks that because marriage is like a contract and divorce is not necessarily a bad thing. “I don’t view marriage as something that has to be forever,” Gaffney said. “People can become a part of something and when it’s just not for them anymore they can end it.”
Although her views on marriage may seem harsh, he is an advocate for love. Gaffney thinks that the first time someone falls in love is when he or she can truly understand it and that is why your first love is someone you never really forget. She thinks college students do know a lot about love and marriage, but the females may be a few more steps ahead. “Being in college I’ve come across different groups of guys and guys are more about the self,” Gaffney said. “Women have a mindset that is more about sharing and finding someone.”
Mechanical engineering major Bubak Eslami sees marriage in his future, but agrees that marriage and love are beginning to separate. “The problem is that the definition of marriage has changed throughout the years,” Eslami said. “People are less committed to the vows.”
He blames the divorce rates on financial issues that are common in America right now. “I know two couples who have gotten a divorce because of financial issues,” Eslami said. “I think that is why people don’t want to get married anymore.”
Eslami does not agree that prenuptial agreements are important. He says he would never ask someone to sign a prenuptial agreement because he thinks that means you are expecting to get a divorce.
Sometimes we forget about what love really means and get caught up in the balloons, flowers, and chocolate that Valentine’s Day brings. We are in a time where it seems like love, marriage and companionship are becoming meaningless.
It’s important to remember that true love does exist. So this Valentine’s Day tell someone you love how much they mean to you, write them a letter instead of picking out a card and congratulate couples that are still married and in love. No matter what society may want you to think, don’t give up your dreams of living happily ever after.