On November 8th 2012, I had been in college for barely four months, when my current boyfriend asked me to be exclusively his. And with the biggest smile on my face and butterflies in my stomach, I accepted the challenges of dating in college.
I am not going to lie to you- focusing on a relationship, a social life, schoolwork and extracurricular activities all at the same time is no walk in the park. In the beginning, I struggled with fitting the new edition in my life, my boyfriend, into my daily schedule. Almost one year later, I think I have it down. My secret? Combination.
Let’s tackle each problem one at a time.
In the beginning of my relationship, balancing my boyfriend and my social life caused me a bundle of unnecessary stress. In my head, my weekends had to be split in two- a night out with friends and a night out with my boyfriend. By now, I have learned that the solution is to combine the two, and luckily my friends thinks my boyfriend is as awesome as I do. If I want to party, my boyfriend can come with. If my boyfriend wants to go bowling with friends- I’ll join him. Spending time with my boyfriend and being social have merged into one, which doesn’t mean to say my boyfriend joins my every outing, but he is almost always welcomed.
Contrary to popular belief, I have found that having a boyfriend while in college does not correlate to bad grades. I repeat, you do not have to sacrifice your academic life for your boyfriend! Instead, combine them! Do schoolwork together, but make a pact- no distractions until your five-minute break. Shutting each other out completely during stressful homework time will do more damage than good- you’ll be thinking of each other the whole time instead of focusing. Having your boyfriend across from you during study time can actually motivate you, and it is no crime to sneak a peak at the adorable way he chews the end of his pen when he’s hard at work.
I run a charity organization on campus of which I recently became co-president, and it takes up a lot of my free time. My boyfriend comes to every event I run. Having him there means I still get to spend time with him even when I’m working, and he’s always a great help when things go wrong!
Your boyfriend and your life do not have to exist separately, combining them will save you much time and effort and make everything you do a lot more enjoyable.
This is not to say I don’t climb mountains trying to make things work once in a while. Or that I don’t shed tears when the world seems like it’s crashing down on me. But at least at the end of the day, I have a best friend whose shoulder I can always count on to be there when I need it. And that is why it is all worth it.