I’ve been thinking about friendships a lot recently. What makes them strong, what makes them constant, and what keeps them alive. These are all important questions, and I know there isn’t one answer, one be-all-end-all answer that decodes the mysterious nature of friendships.
For me, there are friendships that stem back to childhood, and those friendships are set in stone by time. Our moms are friends, we are friends – it’s always been that way. I cannot imagine it being any other way. In some ways, I know that when you are friends with people for so long, they become part of your family. And in some ways, their moms helped raise me and their homes are as familiar as my own.
But as you get older, you form different types of friendships. In high school and college, you may create friendships through similar interests or an overlap in extracurriculars, or a similar major. These friendships may take more work and more time, and there is definitely a learning period where you are nervous to ask the other person to hang out or stressed about what they may think. When does this end? It may just take time and trust, and communication to ensure that the friendship is strong.
Friendships are complicated, and obviously, take a lot of work. It takes effort and dedication, trust and communication. I’d argue that it also just takes time because trust comes with shared experiences where you learn about each other and see if your morals and vision for the future do align. Being honest and open, and even arguing about disagreements, but ultimately coming to conclusions that both people respect is important.
In college, forming forever friendships can be difficult. For one thing, there is an underlying pressure to find your best friends in college, after all, it would only make sense in the “best four years of your life.” For another, you are thrown into an environment where you are just meeting people, and it does speed up the process of bonding. Keeping these friendships can often be difficult, but the same rules do apply. With time, communication, and trust deeper friendships can and will form.