Throughout the span of their lives, many people ponder the question of who they are. How, exactly, is this question supposed to be answered? You may hear phrases such as “the meaning of life” and “finding yourself” thrown about, but most of us generally do not know what these mean. In fact, there is no specific answer, for everyone has their own individual answer. Finding yourself is not a matter of searching on the internet-although that may be beneficial-it is a matter of digging deeper into yourself, your mind, to find out who you are and what you believe. “The idea of finding yourself simply means accessing your confidence, natural and potential abilities, sense of self-worth, self-reliance, and independence.” (Lifecoachspotter.com) There are many benefits to finding out who you are, for knowing yourself is one of the primary, most beneficial, aspects of our lives. “Who are you?” A question that seems to pose the deepest of thought among people who are on a journey to find themselves. You can simply answer your name, right? Well, yes, but not exactly. The question is much deeper than that. By gaining a deeper sense of self, you will be able to answer, and understand, the question of who you are in the inside. “A sense of self is defined as the way a person thinks about and views his or her traits, beliefs, and purpose within the world. In a nutshell, a strong sense of self may be defined by knowing your own goals, values and ideals.” (Livingwellcounselling.com) So how do we gain insight on ourselves? Gaining insight on ourselves is simply a matter of looking at what is important to you. Where do you want to be now and in the future, and what do you hold true to yourself mentally and physically? When we ignore these questions entirely, we are led down a completely different path. This path, most commonly known as “lack of self knowledge”, is a dangerous path that will lead to a life of disappointment. What happens with a lack of self knowledge is a course of recurring stress and lack of direction. Many people seem to forget that little progress can be made in life without any knowledge of who they actually are. Without knowing yourself, you will not know what you want to do, and lead yourself somewhere you may not want to be in life, in jobs, and even in friendships. “When a person lacks a sense of personal identity, their problems extend into every aspect of their life: relationships, career, even mental and emotional health.” (Allisonfallon.com) Many people who do not take the time to learn who they are can suffer from mental diseases that hold them back in society. Many of these problems (anxiety, lack of confidence, stunted dreams, and feelings of emptiness or being meaningless) will result with a lack of self identity. “New research shows that avoiding awareness causes trouble. When body-awareness is lost, we don’t notice stress building up in the body. Finally, the stress builds up to the point that it intrudes into awareness. When it does, it is at such a high level that its appearance startles us.” (Psychologytoday.com). When we do not find out what we value and what we want, we will find ourselves looking to other people for what we determine as a successful and a meaningful life. When we look at others, we find that we measure our success off of theirs and that we fall short of our expectations. Each of our conditions in life is different from others, and measuring them by others is cheating ourselves from our real potential. To find oneself is to find out who you are to you, not to another person. By finding out who you are, you will be given the tools to help overcome many of life’s struggles and be led on a path of happiness in life. Who are you? Finding out the answer to this question has many proven benefits. A full, happy, and successful life is something that is often found in people who have the deepest connection with themselves. This should be enough information to encourage anyone to want to look deeper into themselves, but many people do not embark on this quest till later in their lives, cutting out the potential to do great things earlier on. Why should you want to find who you are? Well, why would you not want to find out who you are? You are you, and knowing yourself is essential to living life to your full potential. “Finding yourself may sound like an inherently self-centered goal, but it is actually an unselfish process that is at the root of everything we do in life. In order to be the most valuable person to the world around us, the best partner, parent etc, we have to first know who we are, what we value and, in effect, and what we have to offer.” (Psychalive.com) Our focus seems to always be on helping others, but what we should remember is that it is very important to focus on yourself before you will be able to focus on others. This question, “who are you”, however simple it may sound, easily makes people’s brains turn to mush. You are you, should you not know yourself the best? However in a society based so much off of what other people do and say, many people find it hard to remember who they are in the midst of other people. Accepting yourself, your beliefs, your likes and interests, above others is essential to unlocking your potential. Allowing the ideas of others to penetrate those of your own, creates a block between who you truly are and the person society has sculpted you to be. When we accept our beliefs, both positive and negative, regardless of what society views as positive and negative, we will gain a greater understanding of ourselves. “Accepting who you are is a vital step towards finding yourself, because you cannot fully know yourself until you recognize aspects about yourself that you don’t like….When we identify both the negative and the positive characteristics and see them simply as parts of ourselves, we can strengthen the positive characteristics by applying them towards goals, and work on weakening the negative by avoiding environments where they’re most likely to come to the surface.” (Lifecoachspotter.com) These characteristics, simply put as core values, are the ideas we value in ourselves and the beliefs that we hold. They can help us to determine who we are, what we like or don’t like about ourselves, and what we believe in. A vital part of accepting who you are is understanding what your core values are and why you believe in them. Core values, whether believed or not, are found in each and every person. From a child to an adult, every person holds a belief that they hold dear to them, whether it be believing in Santa Claus or following the Buddhist religion. So, what exactly are core values? According to YourDictionary, core values are the fundamental beliefs of a person that dictate behavior and can help people understand the difference between right and wrong. They are traits that we have that are very important to us, almost like our nature. We do not usually know we have these traits unless we look into ourselves and understand our ideals. (Friendships, fun, growth, honesty, humor, creativity, etc) Do we value these things and act upon them? If so, they are most likely one of our core values. Some examples of core values can be, but are not limited to: religion, your spirituality or your beliefs, attachments, like love or friendships, nature, your human nature, creativity, your value in life or your definition of the meaning of life. The most common core value is the belief, or disbelief, in a certain religion. Religion gives each person a set of values for them to follow, perfectly fitting the definition of core value. As one of the most important core values, religion helps us to grapple with some of the deepest questions of our existence and our relationships with ourselves and higher powers. “Ultimately to understand the meaning of things and experiences means moving more deeply into an appreciation of the truth, goodness and beauty of life itself, in the myriad experiences, beliefs and encounters we have.” (ABC.net) Religion, in a sense, helps us to understand where we come from and where we are going. As a vital key, religion helps us to figure out who we are by allowing us to question what we believe in. Many people find that researching and learning about other religions have helped them to sculpt an extensive view on the world and on themselves. By looking deeper into the values of other religions, we may find that some values we connect with more than others, and it is okay to have values from foreign religions and values of your own, contrary to popular belief. One religion that has been popular for helping many people ponder the question of who they are is Buddhism. “Buddhism explains a purpose to life, it explains apparent injustice and inequality around the world, and it provides a code of practice or way of life that leads to true happiness. Buddhism has answers to many of the problems in modern materialistic societies. It also includes (for those who are interested) a deep understanding of the human mind” (Buddhanet.net) A well known pursuit within Buddhism is the practice of meditation, which has been proven to aid people in the quest to find out who they are. This activity, contrary to popular belief, comes in many different “shapes and sizes”. Meditation can range anywhere from sitting in silence to taking a walk to writing in a journal. Writing in a journal is a great way for people to identify their problems and take action on them, increasing your self-awareness. Essentially, any method that helps you to connect with yourself and talk with yourself is beneficial and can count as a form of meditation. “Centering your mind and attempting to clear it not only relaxes you, but also can clarify or put into perspective problems and obstacles.” (Lifecoachspotter.com) Meditation not only helps us to deeply connect with ourselves, but it allows us to speak with our minds. Talking and listening to yourself is the best way to know yourself, and can help us to answer some of life’s greatest questions, such as identifying where we want to go, who we are, and what we enjoy or not enjoy. It is vital to figure out what makes us the most happy in life, and meditation is the perfect gateway to figuring that out. There are, however, some major obstacles in today’s world that may distract a person from figuring out what they enjoy in life. Society is one of the major barriers to those who are on a quest to find themselves, and it is vital to acknowledge this threat in order to combat it. “In society everything has to be perfect. Society expects so much of us that it is difficult to truly be ourselves. How did that happen and why? Somewhere along the way of growing up, we learned to stop being ourselves. We are expected to stick with the current trends. We get stared at and talked about if we were something out of the norm from society’s standards. We are afraid to show our true colors because we are afraid of judgement.” (Theodysseyonline.com) Due to this overbearing pressure from society, many people lose connection with their interests. It is vitally important to realize the impact that society plays on what we value as our interests. Embrace the interests that are held dear to you and do not let society try to mar the affection with them. For “if other people’s opinions of you are more important to you than your own… then how can you expect to live a life that’s true to you? How can you expect to ever stop worrying about what other people think of you? How will you ever feel free?” (Huffingtonpost.com) Allowing society to dictate what is of interest and disinterest will result in the recurring path of “lack of self knowledge”. It is important to know what is of interest to you and stay true to that as long as possible. Be true to yourself. A major part of knowing who you are is letting yourself be yourself. It is hard to allow your inner self to manifest when pressures from those around you seem to be too overbearing, but it is important to remember that it is also healthy to let those inner colors show. Holding back your true passions for fear of rejection is just unhealthy and can lead to a negative lifestyle, “ignorance of self”. “By learning to pay attention to your deeper senses and feelings, and by cultivating greater awareness in your life, you can establish a strong connection to yourself and feel confident in knowing what is deeply true for you.” (Mindbodygreen.com) Be truthful to yourself, find what makes you happy, and live your life! In order to find happiness in life, we must first figure out what we enjoy doing and why. So, why do we like what we like? Simply because it makes us happy! As humans, we genuinely want to do things that will satisfy us. Each person has his or her own interests that will make them happy when they participate in them. Finding out what these passions are and pursuing them are a vital part of fulfilling your life. “Nothing that makes you happy is a waste of time, and embracing things that excite you is a major stepping stone to finding yourself.” (Lifecoachspotter.com) Aside from personal interests are personal traits. Personal traits are, but not limited to, being hard working, being lazy, being honest or dishonest, loyal or unloyal, etc. Personal traits also extend to more physical attributes, such as if you are short or tall or have blue eye or green eyes. There are many categories within personal traits, (spirituality, social relationships, occupation, abilities) and it is very important to realize what traits we have so that it is easier to expand, or in some cases, lessen a trait that we have. “So how do you apply your skill set in the best possible way?” (A question every person subconsciously asks every time they start any given task). By identifying what aspects we value, we will be able to understand how to best use them in our lives, or vice versa with negative traits that we would rather do without. The way we act or the traits we have can be attributed to our past experiences, as well as much of what we do can be also be linked back to an occurrence in our former life. Looking into your past is yet another vital step in figuring out who we are. It may seem odd that a part of finding out who you are is looking into your past, but, in fact, it is probably one of the most important steps in knowing yourself. Our past experiences are what determine who we are today. For example, something that happened when you were little is the cause of something that you do today. Many issues within ourselves develop in our younger years, and discovering the root to a problem will be the way to stop that problem from surfacing again. “In order to uncover who we are and why we act the way we do, we have to know our own story. Being brave and willing to explore our past is an important stepping stone on the road to understanding ourselves and becoming who we want to be. Research has shown that it isn’t just the things that happened to us that define who we become, but how much we’ve made sense of what’s happened to us.” (Psychalive.org) If we cover up our past issues and do not look for the root cause, future problems of “lack of self knowledge” will resurface again. “By engaging in this type of thinking and being willing to face the memories that arise, we gain invaluable insights into our behavior. We can then start to consciously separate from the more harmful influences from our history and actively alter our behavior to reflect how we really think and feel and how we choose to be in the world.” (Psychalive.org) Accepting and learning about the past is key to moving forward to a successful, happy life. When we learn about our past experiences, we will gain a greater insight to how and why we act the way we act, which will in return prepare us greatly for our future. Look into the future. You are the captain of your own ship, and therefore you hold your future in your hands. Everyone holds the power to change, and realizing that we hold this power is essential to bettering our lives. Realize what you want in life and strive for that. Through self examination, you have realized what your traits and skills are and will be able to apply them to any future tasks that appear in your life. Now that you know the benefits and steps to finding yourself, seek meaning! Every person in life is on a quest to find themselves, whether they know it or not. Questions frequently appear in our minds that make us think about who we are and where we want to go. “Why do you want to find yourself?” “Who and where do you want to be in life?” Think about what you want most. Whether it be a family, a successful college or academic career, or a job that you have been dreaming for all your life, you must think about these goals and hold them close in order to best achieve them. Knowing what we want is extremely important to finding out who we are. If we are able to find out what we ultimately want in life, we will be able to adjust ourselves, our lives, in order to obtain this want. You have the power to change yourself and be who you want to be. “In order to find ourselves, we must all seek out our own personal sense of purpose. This means separating our own point of view from other people’s expectations of us. It means asking ourselves what our values are, what truly matters to us, then following the principles we believe in.” (Psychalive.org) Go out and find what truly matters to you, follow those principals, and, most importantly, SEEK MEANING! “Who am I?” I am Maggie Beeler. A hardworking, dedicated, and passionate girl who values loyalty and truthfulness to the self. I hold onto my past, not forgetting the things that make me the happiest in life, and think deeply about the future and where I want to be. In a nutshell, I have scrapped the surface of who I am. By digging deeper into my mind, I will uncover many more things about myself. Through self examination I can find out what I value in life, understanding more deeply what core values I wish to extol. It is important, when searching to find yourself, to remember that you are you, you have the power to unlock your hidden potential. So, who are you?