I’m a senior now (admitting it is the first step, right?) so obviously I’m thinking (A LOT) about my future and especially about my career. And networking is a huge part of that. In the competitive job market, a lot of times it’s all about who you know and not necessarily about who you are. So despite my reluctancy, I decided to create a LinkedIn account in hopes that I would somehow magically have a ton of connections with big time CEOs and industry presidents, and my quest toward success would be smooth sailing. I was definitely not excited about having to maintain yet another online profile but I had heard that some employers don’t even bother considering your application if you don’t have a LinkedIn (a statement that now sounds absolutely ridiculous written out) so I sucked it up and clicked the “join now” tab.
That was my first mistake.
Then came the seemingly never ending slew of complete RANDOS (a term I had previously only ever found myself using when describing unknown housemates) who were trying to link with me. Somebody seriously should have sent me the “how to LinkedIn for dummies” manual before allowing me to join the site because I dumbly and unknowingly decided it was a great idea to accept each and every one of these random strangers (remember, I’m trying to meet my future CEO here and I’ve got to start somewhere!)
That was my second mistake.
I joined LinkedIn to better myself and my career, not to be bogged down by creepy middle-aged men looking for personal assistants (whatever that job entails, I really don’t want to find out). What’s going on here? Am I the only one who feels this way? Come on people, fess up.
It’s time to address the issue at hand. LinkedIn is NOT the new Tinder. Here’s a comprehensive list of the guys who have added me on LinkedIn but definitely shouldn’t have:
- The boy in the grade below me who I’ve never spoken to but now have to avoid eye contact with at all costs (I don’t know you but we’re friends on LinkedIn so does that mean I should feel obligated to say hi to you? Let me know…)
- The balding dentist from Minnesota who has absolutely NO reason to be adding me (my fear of dentists is the equivalent of most people’s fear of clowns. Let that simmer a little.)
- The girl I lost touch with in middle school’s dad (seriously how did you find me and what do you want with me!?)
- The ex-boyfriend who is probably the least likely to break into my house and kill me in the night out of all of these creepy men which is (100%) saying something.
- My grandpa (seriously, you’re retired. Why do you have a LinkedIn?)
- The please-shave-your-mustache-I’m-begging-you, bench-riding boy on the lacrosse team who I’ve only ever seen in line at River Station and never anywhere else (he very possibly may live there.)
- The 12-year-old looking kid from New Hampshire who may or may not have gotten this app confused for Pokemon Go on his iPod touch (either that or he is the next Harvard prodigy kid and I actually could do well by being connected with him.)
I couldn’t make this stuff up even if I wanted to. Adding LinkedIn to my list of regrets ASAP!