Before starting university, some people are already in relationships and a big question that goes through their mind is “can this relationship work while we are at separate Unis?”. For me, this wasn’t the case. I was single and ready to meet someone that wasn’t like any of the boys at college, bla bla bla. Yep, you’re right, they were all the same. However, at the end of first year when I had fully given up on trying to meet someone, I got a match on Tinder. Yes I know what you are thinking. Tinder? Really? Don’t tell me that you haven’t been on it or at least been on your friends! Some people are too scared to admit they have Tinder which I understand, but fortunately that is how I met my boyfriend.
Now I can imagine people having doubts about Tinder relationships, but I know quite a lot of couples that found each other on there. I sometimes even forget that that is how I met him. But with Tinder, there is a price to pay as unfortunately for us we live an hour and a half drive away from each other. And that’s just from Leeds, when I go home to Manchester it’s 2 hours. I bet you’re thinking, where on earth does he live? He lives in Scunthorpe and no don’t ask me to explain where it is. Basically in the middle of nowhere, but it’s peaceful and completely different from my city life so it makes a nice change visiting him.
We starting dating in April, when I had finished my exams and Uni work so we could visit each other all the time when he had days off work. We made it through the summer pretty easily, which surprised me as we were further away from each other. When I started back at Uni we try to see each other every week for a few days and it does work for us. I’m not going to lie, it can be really difficult when we are away from each other, for example if one of us is feeling low on a particular day we can’t just pop over to each other’s houses. We have to wait it out until we can see each other properly. It doesn’t help either that we are both normally really busy and sometimes can’t arrange to see each other. Sometimes it can get up to two weeks and by that point sometimes I wonder “how on earth are we making this work so well?”
I think it is all about communication, you need to make sure that the other person is 100% committed in making a long distance relationship work. If one of you isn’t so sure, just don’t do it. It would not be worth the paranoia as you would always be wondering what they are doing for example, if they don’t reply to your messages straight away. If you trust one another completely and you both want it to work, then go for it! It feels so good to know that you have someone that supports you and cares for you, even if you don’t get to see them as much as you like.
I sometimes think it is better that I don’t spend every single day with my boyfriend, because as funny as it sounds, we both do have lives! We both need our space to do our own thing and then when we are together we get to share what we have been up too. I think it’s nice having the balance of your own independence and then being in a relationship. No one wants to be that clingy couple that can’t spend a second away from each other; gross!
Being in a long distance relationship does have it challenges but I also think that it makes you appreciate the time that you have together and you don’t take it for granted.
Images:
1st – https://technospiritualist.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/romance.jpg
2nd – http://www.innerbonding.com/list-sublearningcenter/23/1/relationships.html