We’ve all been there, some of us maybe for a day at a time, others of us for longer seasons in our lives. Whilst our emotions can often be all-consuming and may make us feel abnormal sometimes, here are some simple tips that may help with feeling that little bit better:
- If you need to cry, cry, we’ve all been there, and I promise you it doesn’t revoke you of your baddie status.
2. Accept that it’s okay and normal to not fit into or feel like you don’t fit into the societal norms of beauty – there’s perfection in what you believe to be your imperfections. Live your life for you and not through what you think is expected of you
3. Write your thoughts out and take the time to really understand where your feelings of inadequacy are stemming from and why.
Sometimes it’s nothing more than ‘I’ve simply woken up not feeling great about myself’ and that’s okay. Though sometimes it may be deeper than that and that’s still okay, but processing your emotions will always help in the long run.
4. Remember that there’s more to you than your appearance.
It sucks since there’s hyper-fixation surrounding our looks basically everywhere- whether it be in music or the media: social media with the current idealisation of the BBL (Brazilian butt lift) body, or informative media, such as the news, where one’s race, gender, visible disability or religion is often an instigating factor for violence.
On a systemic level, many of us can’t run away from our looks, and I honestly can’t say it’s any easier to do so on an emotional level; especially when you’re not in the right mind-frame to accept anything other than your negative thoughts. But I can say it’s useful to try to focus on any other attributes you have. Whether it’s a physical feature about yourself that you love, personality traits or the hobbies/interests you have that make you, you.
There’s more to you than what you believe to be your flaws. I’m aware that saying this is not as easy as believing it but others don’t notice your flaws the way you see them, and, more often than not, they may not see what you think is an extremely noticeable flaw at all.
5. Talk to others. If you want to explain what’s going on, do so. If not (for a short-term fix) talk to someone to distract yourself. When you’re down isolation isn’t always the greatest idea so if you know there’s a friend that will help you feel better, music that will uplift you or a series that’ll make you laugh go for it.
6. Even when you don’t believe it tell yourself you’re beautiful. If you don’t believe it, who else will?
Words by: Michele Ngue-Awane
Edited by: Ella Dayer