Starting college can be a difficult transition. I spent my last weeks before move-in trying as hard as possible to avoid looking at anything college-related; I didn’t want to think about it because I was overwhelmed with the prospect of this new beginning. Because of the unshakable feeling of impending doom (I wish I could tell me then that everything will be okay), I felt trapped inside my own head. I’m incredibly lucky that my family was supportive and always there for me. But, during a one A.M. I’m moving into college in twelve days panicked moment while everyone in my house was asleep, I realized I needed a space to release all of the panic I was holding in.
I opened up a document on my Google Docs account and started free-writing. I wrote things down I hadn’t known I was struggling with until the words were staring back at me, honest and unfiltered. And, amazingly, when I’d finished writing, I felt so much more clear-headed and ready. Finally feeling a little more ready for my next big step, I looked at tapestries online with my mom the next morning. That small step was something I’d been avoiding for weeks.
When I started at Lafayette, I began journaling in a little blue notebook, not to start a habit but to have a place to talk about all the new things I was experiencing. Now a second-semester freshman, this notebook is almost completely full. Journaling changed my life for the better, and I think that journaling could help you, too. I’ve tried journaling unsuccessfully in the past. If you’ve had this experience, don’t be afraid to try again! I think that the habit stuck this time because I stopped feeling the need to narrate my life. I just wrote, not bothering to give context for the future me. I don’t write to have a time-capsule of my life, but rather, I journal for me, at the moment that I’m writing.
In college, when I need a few moments to myself after a long day, journaling gives me the privacy I need. Gifting myself time to reflect on good and bad days helps me feel ready for the next day, whatever it may bring. I don’t journal every day—only when I want to. I can work out any struggles I’m having or blather shamelessly on about how much I love my English classes.
What do I write about in my journal? Anything that comes to mind! I recently started trying to journal with the intention to appreciate good things found in difficult moments. This practice helps me be a more positive person; when you start to actively look for the good, you find that there is so much more out there than you might think. I highly recommend trying to record things that made you happy, no matter how minimal—a pretty flower or a smile from a friend.
And maybe, one day in the distant future, I’ll reread what I’ve written. I’ll get to remember this unique part of my life—all of its scary, wonderful, sad, and beautiful moments—and I think that future me having a piece of who I am today is a very special thing.
Journaling might not be for everyone, and that’s totally okay. Most importantly, I hope my experience with journaling reminds you that self-expression is important and helpful during times of transition that might otherwise be overwhelming. If you’re thinking about journaling, give it a try! Journaling is a low-commitment hobby; you can write as often or rarely as you want. Scrawl down what you’re thinking and feeling. Enthuse about your deepest passions. Write letters you’ll never send, notes to your future self, profanity-filled rages, or sappy love notes.
Don’t censor yourself, and write what feels right to you in the moment. To journal, that’s all you need to do!