When the Honeymoon Phase is Over...

It might be cliché to say that relationships have their ups and downs, but they really do. Numerous Communication scholars have concluded that relationship follow a curvy line, like a lot of those infamous “bell shaped curves” or wavelengths.

Of course, people in a relationship are going to try to make it perfect in the beginning. A new relationship can consume our lives as we find ourselves falling in love and discovering new things about a romantic partner. During this Honeymoon phase, it feels like nothing can go wrong and that you’ve found your soulmate.

Eventually, and of course I’m generalizing, things start to plateau, and maybe even decline (not to be harsh). The cute things your partner used to do aren’t so cute anymore, you might feel yourself going out of your way a little bit less for them, and maybe things don’t feel as intimate, or as affectionate or as lovey-dovey as they were a few months ago.

Don’t panic.

Things can change without the relationship ending. If you do feel like it is, then there is time to change.

Upsides:

  • You feel more comfortable. Maybe we stop shaving our legs every single day we see them, maybe we feel like we can be a little more reckless and open with each other.
  • You can be more emotional. Sometimes it doesn’t feel right to come to your partner when you’re going through something, inside or outside of the relationship. Speaking from experience, the deeper into the relationship you are, the more you can expect to rely in your partner for emotional and social support.
  • You learn to balance you school, your friends and family, and your relationship. It’s easy to ignore your other relationships or obligations while you’re in those beginning stages. Now, you can dedicate your time to where it feels good for you.

So, just because you aren’t feeling those butterflies, or that same excitement you might have, doesn’t mean you have nothing to look forward to. The honeymoon phase ending just means that you can move on to better, and deeper parts of the relationship.