How many times have you heard someone tell you to “fake it ’til you make it”? Or “confidence is key”? There are copious amounts of sayings which encourage people to show confidence in order to gain success. People tend to think that the most confident person, whether their confidence is fabricated or not, is the person that will end up on the top. Yet, we can’t help but wonder if fake confidence is the real answer to uncertainty.
At first, someone who displays confidence seems like the people who will know what they’re doing, and therefore, are the ones you want in your corner. However, what if that person really is just faking it? Then what?
Vulnerability has become a quality that is constantly cast in a negative light. Very few people are willing to put their flaws out in the open for everyone to see, especially when in competition with others. No one wants to be seen as the weak link. But could a person’s raw honesty speak more to their character than a strong confidence which you can’t even be certain is real?
I have found that when being honest about my shortcomings, people start to appreciate me as a person more than they did before because there is a kind of bravery that comes to admitting you aren’t as good at something as someone needs you to be. Being vulnerable is seen as being weak, and being weak is seen as being a failure, but once you fail you can only really move up from there.
How much good can truly come from someone pretending they are skilled in something that they actually don’t have a clue how to do? Isn’t it more embarrassing to fail when you were pretending to know what you were doing rather than just admit to not knowing right off that bat? We have been told since the beginning of time that nobody is perfect, but still people fear others knowing that they have flaws. We forget all too often that we all needed to start from somewhere. Expecting people to be 100% confident all the time is absolutely ridiculous and only feeds in to the unrealistic image of perfection which no one can attain.
The belief in the perfection of a person is shallow and unnecessary. No one deserves that pressure, and other people shouldn’t have to be compared to a person who is just as flawed as they are. Imperfections aren’t something to be ashamed of, they’re just a part of life. Apologizing for them is like apologizing for breathing. You can’t help the fact that you’re unable to live without air in your lungs, just like you can’t help that you have faults.
It is childish to be afraid of asking a question. The chances that you are the only person who does not know how to do something are slim to none, and the chances that you embody a weakness that no one else embodies is unrealistic. I believe that confidence isn’t pretending like you are perfect, it is admitting that you’re not. When you choose to show your vulnerability, you’re choosing to show that you are confident enough in yourself that you can be just as good as the rest, regardless of your shortcomings.