Letting Them Down Gently

Simply saying “I don’t want to date you” isn’t always the easiest thing, even though we can all agree it’s the most straightforward. I asked the La Salle community some ways they have said no unwanted advances.

Some people are still just as straightforward as “no”, or don’t try at all to be subtle.

“I literally just say “I don’t like you like that”.” – Female, Junior

“I say “what do you want” when I’m approached…and they usually go away.” –Female, Sophomore

“I ghost them…it’s hard to be blunt and say I don’t like them.” –Female, Junior

“It’s usually directed at guys, so I just say “I’m gay” so that they don’t react badly.” – Female, Grad Student

Some use the tried and true, “it’s not you, it’s me” line, just a little different.

“I’ve been told, “I’m broken from my last relationship.””—Female, Junior

“I used my ex as an excuse not to get involved with anyone in the same group.”—Female, Junior

“I tell them that “I’m working on myself.”—Female, Senior

I might say ,“It’s me… I’m just not ready and I don’t want to hold you back.” – Male, Junior

“Sometimes you just have to tell them “My bad bruh…I just got s**t to do…you feel me?””—Male Grad Student

And others…use some unorthodox methods.

“Tested and proven a couple times…kiss the person once REALLY horribly, but on purpose. They’ll never hit you up again.”—Female, Junior

“I’ve spoken a different language and pretended I didn’t understand him.”—Female, Sophomore 

So...any of these sound familiar? Remeber that when it comes to rejecting someone, honesty is probably the best way to go, even though it's not always the easiest. Saying no doesn't make you a rude or bad person, and never apologize for how you feel.


**Responses have been edited for clarity.