I am 21 years young and have been single my entire life.
Okay, fine. I had one boyfriend for three months when I was 15, but three months is not a substantial length when comparing it to the 257.7 months I have lived thus far.
Shockingly enough, I am happy. I love my life and would not want to change a single thing.
I get asked questions constantly such as, “Aren’t you lonely?” “Are you ever going to settle down and date someone?” “Why don’t you go out with him?” “A guy is texting you and you aren’t going to go out on a date? Why?” “Do you think you’ll ever commit?”
Truth be told, I am happy alone.
I have witnessed so many toxic relationships growing up that have made me realize being with someone is not worth it right now. At this age, we are too immature to handle a respectful, trustworthy relationship. I have seen my friends experience being cheated on, lied to, and broken up with. I have seen my friends alienate themselves to be with their boyfriends. I have seen my friends delete all their male contacts, and any guy on their social media to please their boyfriend. I have seen my friends be disappointed when their boyfriend “did not buy them enough presents for their birthday.” I have seen my friends patiently wait for a long time until the guy they like committed to them. I have seen heartache, rage, and jealousy consume my best friends because of the relationship they were in.
I’m sorry, but that is not the life for me.
I do not want to delete my entire guy friends because of my boyfriend’s jealousy issue. I do not want to stop going out and having fun because my boyfriend doesn’t trust me. I do not want to have to worry about what I’m wearing because there’s a chance my boyfriend will disapprove and be angry with me. I do not want to be glued to my phone because if I do not answer my boyfriend in five minutes, we will fight for hours. I do not want to have someone knowing my every move. I do not want an additional parent.
It’s not even a matter of wanting it; I simply do not need that.
Now, don’t get me wrong. There are successful and happy relationships. Some people, including some of my friends in relationships, have not even experienced what I listed above. Those are just a few examples of what I have seen. My friends who have endured some of it though are still in happy, committed relationships. They have a different type of strength than I do. They are strong women who have dealt and still deal with these situations and emotions because they are in love and will fight for it. As long as they are happy, I am happy for them!
People are confused by my life choices all the time, but what they do not understand is that it is okay to be alone.
Of course, I do not want to be alone forever. That is not my plan. But for right now, I want to enjoy my life. I want to be able to live it. I want to embrace my youth because I know for a fact when I’m sitting with my children, in the future, and they ask how high school, college, and my 20’s were I will have some kickass legendary stories.
I am living a damn good life, and yes, it’s because I’m single.