The first thing you think of when someone says they’re pregnant is congratulations, right? It’s normal to hear moms asking their daughters when they’re going to give them grandchildren, right? To many of us, both of those answers are yes. What happens though when things don’t go according to plan? We rarely hear about the other side of pregnancy: miscarriages, fertility issues, postpartum depression, and the always lurking societal urge to have children. For many women, pregnancy and children are supposed to be some of the happiest times of their lives, so what happens when it’s not?
What pushed me to write this article is the recent surge of talk about miscarriages and postpartum issues in shows like Teen Mom OG. If you’re an avid fan like me, you’ll know what I mean. For years, the show has covered some hard-hitting topics including adoption issues, postpartum depression, and recently, miscarriages. With the show just closing its seventh season, the original girls have come a long way from their teenage pregnancy days. Many of them have grown up a lot and almost all of them has continued to build their family. We have seen Catelynn and Tyler struggle with Carly’s adoptive parents to work with them to find time to see their daughter. After the birth of their second daughter, Novalee, Catelynn experienced postpartum depression and struggled with her mental health. This season, Catelynn recounted her fear of having postpartum depression again if she were to have another child. However, her and Tyler’s desire to have another child pushed her to remove her IUD and eventually become pregnant. Both parents were over-the-moon excited and quickly shared the news with their families, only to suffer a miscarriage not long into the pregnancy. Maci also revealed on this season that she not only suffers from polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), which can be incredibly debilitating, but that she also recently suffered a miscarriage. On another MTV show, Jersey Shore Family Vacation, Jenni “Jwoww” Farley revealed that she too had suffered a miscarriage before filming season four of Jersey Shore.
Sure, you may not like MTV and many people complain about how the shows are “trashy” and exploit their stars, but that’s up to you. MTV is quietly doing something really important here and I think it’s worth noting. For years, decades, centuries, all of time, women having been dealing with fertility issues, miscarriages, postpartum depression – among other issues that pregnancy can bring. Yet still, none of these things seem normalized. Mothers still feel as though they did something wrong, that they’re to blame – when they typically aren’t. The conversation that MTV has quietly started is an important one. The conversation seeks to reach out to moms everywhere and show them that they’re not alone. So many women are going through these issues everyday and it’s important to talk about them, not just sweep them under the rug.
What I would also like to note is the bravery of these women, among many others, who have chosen to share their stories in the public eye. Having the world know your darkest secrets can’t be easy and I give them props for being brave enough to help women everywhere. I hope the momentum from these conversations continues so that mothers everywhere can know they’re not alone.