Lately, I’ve been reflecting on the expectations I have when it comes to guys and the overall aspect of dating. Growing up surrounded by fictional guys from books, movies, and shows led to me forming an ideal guy in my head. Yes, I was one of those girls who fell for fictional guys but you’d be lying if you said you haven’t fallen for a fictional character. When talking to friends about this, I found that I wasn’t the only one. What I often noticed from those conversations was that we labeled our views as “unrealistic expectations.” Is it unrealistic to want a decent partner? A partner who’s attentive, caring, and overall puts effort into understanding us.
We all have different expectations but we shouldn’t have to label them as unrealistic. We aren’t asking for perfectly sculpted men with a “greek bod and piercing blue or green eyes.” Unlike some men, who judge on appearance, most of us just want someone who we can click with. This person should value us because of who we are and not due to our looks. Some men prefer or expect their significant other to be a certain way, but when women voice their expectations, we’re seen as being “unrealistic” or too picky.
Why must we get judged for our preferences? We are allowed to have these expectations. We can’t settle for someone because of judgment from others. I know everyone has to make compromises in a relationship but there are some things we can’t overlook. At the end of the day, no one but ourselves will be in a relationship. It’s up to us to make sure we aren’t settling because there’s a pressure to, but because we believe we have found the one that meets our expectations of being a decent human being. So stop with the BS of calling them “unrealistic expectations.” They are just expectations, ones you shouldn’t have to shy away from.