This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Kutztown chapter.
*Trigger warning: eating disorder content*
This recipe has won global contests and awards! Passed on through generations of women, this classic recipe has few variations. Of course, you’re always welcome to add your own spin. But, if you’re looking for an authentic recipe for anorexia, this one is sure to get the job done!
- Take out your favorite mixing bowl. Make sure it isn’t too big or you won’t look ladylike.
- Add ½ cup of backhanded compliments. Some of my favorites include: “You’re really filling out!” and “You’re really hungry today, huh?” The shifting eyes and forced smile from your grandma adds that extra spice she thinks you asked for.
- Pour in ¼ cup of passive aggressive gestures. Your mom hanging food charts on the fridge, planning your weekly meals, and taping nutrition facts to the cabinets are all perfect for this step.
- Fold in ½ cup of too much Internet access. This is where you can really get creative. Whether it’s Pro Ana Tumblr, eating disorder Twitter or Instagram, or even Reddit, the possibilities are endless. This is where you’ll be overexposed to extreme diet plans, images, and “tips” at a concerningly young age. This includes eating less calories than a toddler and girls that look one day away from the grave.
- Add ⅓ cup of explicit insults. You could use: “We need to discuss your weight.” Or, “The doctor said you’re in the obese category.” Even the old fashioned, “You’re gaining weight.” Use whatever feels right in this recipe. You could even add all of them if you’re feeling spontaneous!
- Using a whisk, vigorously beat the mixture until the ingredients are fully incorporated. Make sure there aren’t any lumps or you’ll run the recipe! The consistency should be thin and runny.
- Bake at 15 degrees until golden brown. This is when all of your lovely ingredients will become fragrant and taunting.
- Remove from the oven and let it cool. It may take years to cool, or it may never cool at all.
- Unfortunately, you can’t eat it. But, you can pass it along to a friend, a sister, a daughter, anyone! This recipe is universal. Or, you can keep it for yourself to stare at for the next ten years.