How do you know when to let go. When to let go of the job, the friend, the homework assignments, and all of your high expectations. Welcome to “Big Sis, Tells All”. Today, I will give you some insight on my journey and sharing my tips I wish I had known earlier about letting go.
I was once a young girl sitting nervously on the edge of my seat, waiting to be called on, stand, and perform. As an athletic dancer for many years, there comes a certain amount of pressure that every performer must overcome.
Whether the pressure be an audition, interview, exam, or challenging life event, we all experience it.
As a college student, I have taken every opportunity to try as many things as possible and fail as many times as possible. I have tried daredevil adventures such as climbing mountains in the Middle East, volcanoes in Hawaii, sparred with Mixed Martial Arts athletes, worked alongside the brightest minds in Silicon Valley, participated in CrossFit and powerlifting, and much more.
I will be the first to tell you, there is always more to go. Someone smarter, more capable, more experienced, and more dedicated than you. But we (including myself) often forget the younger version of ourselves that would be amazed at what our older version does now.
For every late night studying, hard workout session, and grueling internal battle, was it all worth it?
That’s the million dollar question we all must individually answer. For me, it wasn’t worth the trophies.
My accomplishments didn’t keep me warm on a cold winter night. My friendships did though. My passion projects did. My silly games and gimmicks did. My messy style of cooking brought me much joy. My painfully bad paintings, half started and half empty, brought light into my life. But these are all simple and virtually free things. Yet, for many of us, these things are more meaningful than losing 10 pounds or getting to the final round of interviews at a Fortune 500 firm.
And while I don’t pretend to know your life, your goals, your struggles, or your circumstances, I’d like to offer a few words of encouragement to my younger self who I see in many women like me. And so, if this is helpful, feel free to pick and choose what resonates with you.
Stop Worrying about Being “Right”, OR being Good at [it], and Looking Cool while doing it.
Shake off any desire to look put-together because nobody can relate to that. What people can relate to is mistakes, falling out of bed from a loud alarm clock buzzer, mismatched outfits, half-done makeup, empty coffee cups, and pimple outbreaks WELL into your 30’s.
Take it from Elsa when she sings, “Let it go. Let it go. That perfect girl is gone. Here I stand and Here I stay… The cold never bothered me anyway”.
Whatever is meant for you, will find you.
PERIOD. I know what you’re thinking. Stop that right now. There is no need to doubt your strengths.
You do not need to chase him or her. Instead of looking for the right partner, friend group, bars, or job, ask yourself, who do you want to be and how would she carry herself?Walk into the room with ease, knowing people already love you and want to be your friend because most people do want to be your friend.
In my experience,the fastest and best way to find yourself is to be yourself, for yourself, with yourself, and with others.You are allowed to take off your mask of polite nods and thank you’s and be your silly, colorful, and spirited self. In fact, you will attract your people when you stop looking for them. It seems the opposite, I know, but it’s not. Connection happens at a deeply human level and is often an immediate energy transfer. Believe it or not, your gut knows exactly who is meant for you and who is not. Trust yourself because you got this!